Jac & Jae Went Up the Hill...

Gasping for air? Catching flies? Calling the Yeti? Or just a mentalist?


'Jae, do you wanna go for a ride tomorrow (Sunday just gone) to Richmond Park and back? 'I can't go to the gym right now as I have spots on my face!'
'Yeah, that sounds like a good idea, the weather should be good.......but what about instead I drive us both to Peaslake and do a bit of the Surrey Hills.....show you what I do every week?, 'I was going there anyway and it won't be as busy as RP and a little more scenic too.......I won't take you anywhere you're not comfortable with and...........
'Yeah, alright!....alright, we'll go, we'll go!

So go we did! Her first time ever proper off-road on a mountain bike. She's fit, so I knew she would get up the steep hills. She cycles to work every day of the week and goes to the gym every weekday too. But she had never been up to the hills before and I was a little apprehensive as to her confidence on the rough stuff. She is shit scared of heights and is far too cautious riding her bike on the roads and she doesn't have removable hair (cycle helmet) and both her brakes are next to useless but work well enough if you pull the lever in until it is touching the handlebar grip.....new brake pads asap!. The beginning of our route.....trying as hard as best I could to take an easy way around all the difficult parts.....She was already complaining that it was too steep and she just wanted a leisurely ride in the countryside. But I have described to her on numerous occasions just what it is like up there, even avoiding the tricky parts it ain't for the inexperienced rider. But she plodded on regardless and even went back to the bottom of a steepish incline near the summit to do it over again because she put her foot down (know as chocolate footing.....nothing to do with dog poo btw) halfway up when she cycled over a rock (more like a small pebble.....a very small one) and lost her balance. Jac put her foot down on her second attempt also but suprised me with wanting to try again and she seemed to be enjoying it by the time we got to the top.
There were a couple of bikers who disappeared down into the Yoghurt Pots as we rode by it's entrance. Jac watched in awe as they blasted down into it without so much as a brake lever being pulled! 'They must be mental! she said. I normally go that way I shouted and almost followed them in, but decided to stick to the more easy parts (still off-road) and see if we would meet them down at the bottom of the Pots and the top of Telegraph Row. We didn't and I thought they must still be in there trying out a few of the jumps or drowning in the yoghurt.....they looked like that sort of rider. Jac was beginning to enjoy it more and more and we headed off up past the entrance to Telegraph Row (a very narrow fastish downhill section that runs right beneath some telegraph poles.....who'd have thought of calling it that eh;) and took the green lanes (unsurfaced roads usually only for walkers, horses & ever so slightly mental cyclists) that criss-cross the whole hill. After about five minutes we came across the two other riders we saw before, who were resting by where the Telegraph Row track crossed our green lane, and eventually we wound up crossing the Row again and Jac said 'Can we go in there.....see what it is like......see if I like it......I won't die will I?' As I was asking Jac if she was sure, I found I had already entered the track and then said 'Follow me girl'. After about 100yds we came across a biggish dip in the track at which Jac had to get off at....then in the blink of an eye the two riders caught us up again and nearly took Jac clean off the face of the hill! They were quick to avoid her. She also scraped her shin on her pedal as she stepped off the bike.......blood dribbled down her shin....at last she was beginning to look the part;)
I was glad Jac wanted to try a bit of the better stuff and think maybe after her seeing the other riders bombing it down into the Pots she really wanted to try herself. I thought as long as we went slow enough, almost anywhere on the hill should be fine. Obviously there are some parts that would be better done on foot but mostly we did the same stuff that I normally do but just much much slower. Jac even cycled down most of Barry Knows Best! A little bit of pushing down & up the steepish part near the beginning & end. Then as when we reached the bottom section...very steep and rooty, we kept having to move over for faster cyclists coming by and we watched them, saying to each other how skilled you have to be to go down so fast. Then down came this rider who I can only describe as a total and utter maniac! Jac was astonished as was I! I have never seen anyone come down the bottom section of BKB like this chap did yesterday! He basically treated the whole section as if it was paved with tarmac. Unbelievable stuff!! Then we saw this van at the bottom waiting for him with his teams name on the side......a professional maniac I'm sure;) He even found time to yell 'Alright?' as he mentalled on past us.
Pretty good day all in all, considering that after just five minutes In to our off-road experience together, I thought Jac & I were destined to make a b-line for Richmond Park instead. She want's to go back.....to the hills, which is fab, but preferably before her brakes fail her completely. Plus, she looks a little too cool for my liking to be out in those hills. Can you believe that she was the only cyclist up there with a cycle bell, wearing designer sunglasses and no helmet on? I can;) I haven't a clue who she thinks she is going to bump into up there. Most of the people she knows can either be found in a pub somewhere claiming they Love Joy Division (when they haven't even heard of them) or sniffing a strange white powdery substance that isn't skin softening talcum powder;)
We did 9.34 miles together in nearly two hours, but it wasn't enough for me and after I dropped Jac off back home, I dumped my car back at mine and went for another ride around Bushy Park via the Thames tow-path and ended up cycling 24 miles in total. The weather for the whole day was very nice and obviously spring has done what it was invented to do & er.......Sprung. The rabbits were out in force, each with it's little kamikaze head band on.....as were the midges, finding the warm, salty wet insides of my mouth entirely too orgasmic not to enter! Those things will be the death of me, I'm sure........I'm lying on the side of the path choking to death on a whole mouthful of the pesky twits, rabbits feverishly humping my ankles and the squirrels going sraight for the nuts! My nuts!


Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........869.68 miles.