My Kayaking for March 2007...

Jae in Twickenham...March 2007.


Three times this month...getting better right? Getting fitter...water in the Thames getting more manegable...getting warmer...a little bit of all of those me thinks. Next month should be more exciting...stay tuned:)


Thursday 8th March 2007 @ 16:30ish for 1hr 30 mins. Twickenham Riverside by the church, Three times around Eel Pie Island, high tide and very strong current. RPM alone, dry, mild, dusk, temp 12, wind 11.

Tuesday 13th March 2007 @ 17:00pmish for 1hr. Twickenham Riverside by church, twice around Eel Pie Island, lowish tide, strong current. RPM alone, dry, mild & sunny/dusk, temp 13, wind 10.

Thursday 22nd March 2007 @ 21:00 for 1hr 30mins, Gurnell Leisure Centre, Ealing, kayak rolling for beginners with Lee & Ian. Great fun.....although none of us managed to do a roll alone. We did however learn to rescue each other. Warm water....indoor pool.....Dagger RPM.



Jason





(C) JPT 2007

"Little Spaces"

Daisy & Jae Wednesday (see below).


Seems that the ground feels closer recently....the soil....moisture....ants and creepy crawlies. That smell that comes with them all coming together. That fresh rotting smell of old making way for new. Things are going pretty well right now....disregarding the pain in my ankle & elbow joints......Disintegration in progress! Just under the surface of the ground that I walk upon.....little holes.....and all their cosy hiding places....I might decide to fall into one of the deeper ones one of these days.....just for a while, until I feel right to come back out again. Curl up and fall asleep and dream a while.
I'll just have to make do with some of the more shallow ones for the time being.....much more shallow! That I can handle....that I have been dipping into and out of for years now. Little spaces for hiding things. Little spaces for dreaming about. Little spaces where I can go for a little cuddle.....a kiss......a warm shoulder.....a smile or tear or two (maybe)......hey, or even just to be able to think straight. Little spaces for me.
You want to know where my little spaces are? I am afraid that I can't tell you that! You see, I don't want to go there one night and find that there is someone else in it....if you know what I mean? There are no locks on it.....no doors even. No directions to and no exit from. It is just there.....and I know where it is.....I like it there and this is why I go there. (what the hell am I going on about?)

So enough about metophorical hiding places and the like! I expect most, if not all the above ramblings went right over your very heavy heads? I'm not surprised....I have a heavy head too;) But really I shouldn't grumble right......I have things pretty good don't I? I do! I can honestly say that I ......do you know what? I can't seem to think normally these days. I can't even write about how I am feeling! I don't know how I am feeling at all! I have always found it the hardest thing in the world to do....is explain how I am feeling. Soo many people have over the years said to me 'Smile Jason.' And I say 'I am smiling....I promise.'
'Are you feeling alright Jae?'
'Yes' I would say or....'Yeah....sort of'......But mostly (if not always) yes.
And I do most of the time.......right?
See what I mean! I 'Feel' just as well as the next man along does......but what on earth am I feeling? F*ck knows! I could lie I suppose. I am a very good liar. I can make things up very well too. Vivid imagination. Vivid dreams and some pretty wonderful ideas, my ideas.....useless ones obviously. Why then do I feel brain dead so much of the time? And when I do have a conversation with someone I know, why can't I do it normally? Where do all the inuendos come from.....why do I feel the need to rip the piss out of everyone.....while I am talking to them face to face? Whats all that about? Do they notice? Of course they do! My sense of humour doesn't leave a lot to the imagination either! Mostly references to sexual activities! Not normal activities either! I like to shock and I like to make people feel uncomfortable.....my friends and family will tell you. Why is it that I do that? Is it a defence mechanism or what? I have often arrived back home from an evening out with family or friends and sat there and wondered what the hell they must think of me! It makes me cringe to think that I have made a complete tit of myself. Or do all people behave in the same exact way as I do?

Enough already!

No cycling this weekend I am afraid! My local bike shop will have it for some much needed maintenance & a few replacement parts.....should have it back Monday I don't mind too much as it is pouring with rain right now and I hurt from my kayaking last night at Ealing pool. That was great fun. Lee & Ian were there and about 27 others too.....not much room left to kayak to be honest.....but fun. I thought I had broken my poor little right elbow at one point! It was time to get out and I paddled as fast as I could to the pools side so as to beach the kayak and jump out without getting my legs wet. Just that I failed to see the hand rails arching over the steps and caught the very end of my right paddle on it which forced my arm to close!......It don't like closing at all.....the damage in the joint prevents it and if I force it......OUCH!!!!! Well, it was forced and my f**cking god!! Did it hurt! I had sort of beached it, but was more concerned for my arm.....I even looked at it to see if it had broke it was that painful. It didn't and after a few minutes I tried again and done it properly. More Factor VIII when I got home. I pulled a muscle in my left tricep performing a vertical paddle roll....which I managed to do a few times:) It seems I am getting there....but still a long way to go! And somewhere during the hour & a halfs session I managed to injure my back too! I can't wait until next Thursday:)

Then on Wednesday I took my Niece around Richmond Park for a bike ride. She has been dying to get out on her bike again. She wants to get fit and well, she enjoys it too and even wants to go to where I took Jac the other day. As you can see from the photo above, I don't have a helmet on. Daisy wore it but obviously needs her own. Unlike my mate Jac (tut-tut;), Daisy is willing to wear a helmet (removable hair). Her bike works well too and her brakes are fab. Unlike Jacs;) I will be fixing Jacs as soon as she gives me her bike. It is fine on the roads (which is where she rides it normally), but not for steep, gravel strewn trails in the middle of the countryside;)
Daisy was well chuffed to have cycled 7 and a half miles. It was warm too.....like a summers day almost. It's all gone tits up again now!
Daisy impressed me with the way she kept taking her bike off the main track in the park and onto the little dirt sections. I swear she had a permanent smile across her face the whole time:) Every time I looked back, there it was:) She'll make a good mountain biker in the future I am sure! Next I will try and get her & Jac into a kayak;) Now that will be one to see;)
And on Tuesday Jac & I did 25 miles around RP & BP together. She is back at the gym now as her spots have cleared up;) She does make me laugh:)



Jason


P.s. Gonna miss your postings UC!! Take care:)







(C) JPT 2007.........909.39 miles.

My Cycling for March 2007...

Me in Winterfold Woods (7-Mar-07)...Ouch...


Thursday 1st March 2007 @ 17:20pm, RP, 17.65 miles, 1hr 22mins pedaling (out of (1hr 24mins total), dusk/dark, dry, mild, very light breeze, av 12.9, max 26.1, temp 8, wind 13. Total 548.01 miles.

Saturday 3rd March 2007 @ 13:00ish, RP, BP, 36.02 miles, 2hrs 50 mins pedaling (out of 3hrs 15mins total), light & sunny with one heavy down pour, mild, very light breeze, av 12.7, max 24.2mph, temp 9, wind 13. Total 584.03 miles.

Monday 5th March 2007 @ 16:30ish, RP, 17.36 miles, 1hr 21 mins pedaling (out of 1hr 27 mins total), dusk/dark, damp after rain, mild, strongish wind, av 12.7, max 26.8 mph, temp 10, wind 21. Total 601.39 miles.

Tuesday 6th March 2007 @ 16:45ish, BP (part) & tow-path, 11.85 miles, 54 mins pedaling (out of 58 mins total), light/dusk, dry, mild, medium wind, av 13, max 21.6 mph, temp 12, wind 10. Total 613.24 miles.

Wednesday 7th March 2007 @ 13:15ish, HH, PH, WW, 18.12 miles, 2hrs 35 mins pedaling (out of 3hrs 50 mins total), light & mostly sunny, dry but very wet from rain in the night, cut my bloody ankle!, mild, no wind, av 7.0, max 27.3 mph, temp 11, wind 6. Total 631.36 miles.

Friday 9th March 2007 @ 18:50, RP with Lee & Ian, (I lost my trip computer after a fallen branch smashed between my spokes & forks tearing the sensor off.....we found it in the leaves and branches & Lee & I fixed it back on that night) 21.00 miles, 2hrs pedaling (out of 2hrs 30mins total), dark & chilly, very muddy on the far perimeter trail, medium wind, av 10.3, max 21mph, temp 6, wind 9. Total 652.36 miles.

Saturday 10th March 2007 @ 09:45am, BP, RP (part with Angela aka Warrior Woman), 32.42 miles, 2hrs 52 mins pedaling (out of 5hrs total), sunny & mild, bit mucky, medium wind, av 11.2, max 26.6 mph, temp 12, wind 16. Total 684.78 miles...(305.90 miles since I got Cateye)

Sunday 11th March 2007 @ 2pm, BP, RP, 32.80 miles, 2hrs 37 mins pedaling (out of 4hrs 17 mins total), sunny & very mild, drying out nicely, medium wind, av 12.4, max 26.1 mph, temp 17, wind 14. Total 717.58 miles.

Wednesday 14th March 2007 & 12:30pm ish, LH, HH, PH, 22.02 miles, 2hrs 53 mins pedaling (out of 3hrs 50 mins total), sunny & very mild, drying out very nicely, no wind, av 7.6, max 35.7 mph, temp 12, wind 6. Total 739.60 miles...(360.80 miles since I got Cateye)

Thursday 15th March 2007 @ 17:30ish, BP 14.49 miles, 1hr 8mins pedaling (out of 1hr 12 total), dusk, mild with midgeys, no wind, av 12.8, max 20.3mph, temp 10, wind 6. Total 754.09 miles.

Friday 16th March 2007 @ 20:00pm (Mums 64th Birthday), HH, PH, WW (with Lee & Ian), 13.38 miles, 1hr 44mins pedaling (out of 2hrs 16mins total), dark & cool, no wind, dry, av 7.7, max 26.6 mph, temp 9, wind 16. Total 767.47 miles.

Sunday 18th March 2007 @ 17:30ish (Millie's 3rd Birthday), RP, 20.57 miles, 1hr 38 mins pedaling (out of 1hr 45 mins total), dusk/dark, cold, strong wind, dry/spitting, av 12.6, max 24.7 mph, temp 5, wind 18. Total 788.04 miles...(409.2 miles since I got Cateye)

Monday 19th March 2007 @ 16:40, Met Jac from work & did the tow-path...Tedd...King), 15.13 miles, 1hr 10mins pedaling (out of 1hr 30 mins total), dusk, cold & windy, av 12.9, max 26.2 mph, temp 4, wind 10. Total 803.17 miles...(424.4 miles since I got Cateye)

Wednesday 21st March 2007 @ 15:30ish,RP, BP, 30.86 miles, 2hrs 22mins pedaling (out of 2hrs 44 mins total), light & mostly sunny, cold and medium wind, av 13, max 27.3 mph, temp 7, wind 7. Total 834.06 miles...(455.3 miles since I got Cateye)

Friday 23rd March 2007 @ 20:30 with Lee & Ian, 11.58 miles, 1hr 31 mins pedaling (out of 2hrs 24 mins total), pitch black & very cold, dry but very damp under tyre, no wind, av 7.6, max 22.1 mph, temp 4, wind 4. Total 845.64 miles...(466.8 miles since I got Cateye)

Sunday 25th March 2007 @ 14:30ish, HH & PH (part) with Jac and BP on my own later. Jac & I...9.34 miles, Me...total 24.04 miles, Jac & I...1hr 23mins pedaling (out of 1hr 55mins total), Me...total pedaling 2hr 26mins (out of 2hrs 56mins total), sunny & dry, warmish, light breeze, av 9.8, max 31.9 mph, temp 11, wind 9. Jac cycled down BKB and cut her shin on Telegraph Row:) (see Blog) Total 869.68 miles...(490.9 miles since I got Cateye)

Tuesday 27th March 2007 @ 17:40, (25.25 miles) met Jac from work and did 24 miles together around RP & BP, 2hrs 10 mins pedaling (out of 2hrs 30 mins total), sunny and warm/cool then dusk, light breeze, av 11.6 max 24.1 mph, temp 15, wind 9. Total 894.93 miles...(516.2 miles since I got Cateye)

Wednesday 28th March 2007 @ 16:30 with Daisy, RP, 7.50 miles together, Daisy's first time with me this year.....she can't wait to go again (see photos for todays date), then I took her home and went round BP on my own, another 11 miles, (18.46 miles total), daisy did 1hr 5 mins & me 1hr 50 mins (1hr 33 mins pedaling, warm & very sunny....summer like, slight breeze, av 11.8, max 23.9 mph, temp 17, wind 6. Total 909.39 miles...(534 miles since I got Cateye)


Jason




(C) JPT.........909.39 miles

Jac & Jae Went Up the Hill...

Gasping for air? Catching flies? Calling the Yeti? Or just a mentalist?


'Jae, do you wanna go for a ride tomorrow (Sunday just gone) to Richmond Park and back? 'I can't go to the gym right now as I have spots on my face!'
'Yeah, that sounds like a good idea, the weather should be good.......but what about instead I drive us both to Peaslake and do a bit of the Surrey Hills.....show you what I do every week?, 'I was going there anyway and it won't be as busy as RP and a little more scenic too.......I won't take you anywhere you're not comfortable with and...........
'Yeah, alright!....alright, we'll go, we'll go!

So go we did! Her first time ever proper off-road on a mountain bike. She's fit, so I knew she would get up the steep hills. She cycles to work every day of the week and goes to the gym every weekday too. But she had never been up to the hills before and I was a little apprehensive as to her confidence on the rough stuff. She is shit scared of heights and is far too cautious riding her bike on the roads and she doesn't have removable hair (cycle helmet) and both her brakes are next to useless but work well enough if you pull the lever in until it is touching the handlebar grip.....new brake pads asap!. The beginning of our route.....trying as hard as best I could to take an easy way around all the difficult parts.....She was already complaining that it was too steep and she just wanted a leisurely ride in the countryside. But I have described to her on numerous occasions just what it is like up there, even avoiding the tricky parts it ain't for the inexperienced rider. But she plodded on regardless and even went back to the bottom of a steepish incline near the summit to do it over again because she put her foot down (know as chocolate footing.....nothing to do with dog poo btw) halfway up when she cycled over a rock (more like a small pebble.....a very small one) and lost her balance. Jac put her foot down on her second attempt also but suprised me with wanting to try again and she seemed to be enjoying it by the time we got to the top.
There were a couple of bikers who disappeared down into the Yoghurt Pots as we rode by it's entrance. Jac watched in awe as they blasted down into it without so much as a brake lever being pulled! 'They must be mental! she said. I normally go that way I shouted and almost followed them in, but decided to stick to the more easy parts (still off-road) and see if we would meet them down at the bottom of the Pots and the top of Telegraph Row. We didn't and I thought they must still be in there trying out a few of the jumps or drowning in the yoghurt.....they looked like that sort of rider. Jac was beginning to enjoy it more and more and we headed off up past the entrance to Telegraph Row (a very narrow fastish downhill section that runs right beneath some telegraph poles.....who'd have thought of calling it that eh;) and took the green lanes (unsurfaced roads usually only for walkers, horses & ever so slightly mental cyclists) that criss-cross the whole hill. After about five minutes we came across the two other riders we saw before, who were resting by where the Telegraph Row track crossed our green lane, and eventually we wound up crossing the Row again and Jac said 'Can we go in there.....see what it is like......see if I like it......I won't die will I?' As I was asking Jac if she was sure, I found I had already entered the track and then said 'Follow me girl'. After about 100yds we came across a biggish dip in the track at which Jac had to get off at....then in the blink of an eye the two riders caught us up again and nearly took Jac clean off the face of the hill! They were quick to avoid her. She also scraped her shin on her pedal as she stepped off the bike.......blood dribbled down her shin....at last she was beginning to look the part;)
I was glad Jac wanted to try a bit of the better stuff and think maybe after her seeing the other riders bombing it down into the Pots she really wanted to try herself. I thought as long as we went slow enough, almost anywhere on the hill should be fine. Obviously there are some parts that would be better done on foot but mostly we did the same stuff that I normally do but just much much slower. Jac even cycled down most of Barry Knows Best! A little bit of pushing down & up the steepish part near the beginning & end. Then as when we reached the bottom section...very steep and rooty, we kept having to move over for faster cyclists coming by and we watched them, saying to each other how skilled you have to be to go down so fast. Then down came this rider who I can only describe as a total and utter maniac! Jac was astonished as was I! I have never seen anyone come down the bottom section of BKB like this chap did yesterday! He basically treated the whole section as if it was paved with tarmac. Unbelievable stuff!! Then we saw this van at the bottom waiting for him with his teams name on the side......a professional maniac I'm sure;) He even found time to yell 'Alright?' as he mentalled on past us.
Pretty good day all in all, considering that after just five minutes In to our off-road experience together, I thought Jac & I were destined to make a b-line for Richmond Park instead. She want's to go back.....to the hills, which is fab, but preferably before her brakes fail her completely. Plus, she looks a little too cool for my liking to be out in those hills. Can you believe that she was the only cyclist up there with a cycle bell, wearing designer sunglasses and no helmet on? I can;) I haven't a clue who she thinks she is going to bump into up there. Most of the people she knows can either be found in a pub somewhere claiming they Love Joy Division (when they haven't even heard of them) or sniffing a strange white powdery substance that isn't skin softening talcum powder;)
We did 9.34 miles together in nearly two hours, but it wasn't enough for me and after I dropped Jac off back home, I dumped my car back at mine and went for another ride around Bushy Park via the Thames tow-path and ended up cycling 24 miles in total. The weather for the whole day was very nice and obviously spring has done what it was invented to do & er.......Sprung. The rabbits were out in force, each with it's little kamikaze head band on.....as were the midges, finding the warm, salty wet insides of my mouth entirely too orgasmic not to enter! Those things will be the death of me, I'm sure........I'm lying on the side of the path choking to death on a whole mouthful of the pesky twits, rabbits feverishly humping my ankles and the squirrels going sraight for the nuts! My nuts!


Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........869.68 miles.

Shake, Rattle & no Roll...

My little leggie's just gone midnight at 00:13 Saturday morning!


There was a young man from Twickenham
Who wore bigger shoes to be sick in them
His Mum thought how odd
His Dad opened his gob
And said, 'Well if it makes you go quick in them.'


So, I made it to the weekend....just about! My kayaking roll course on Thursday...(unfortunately Ros, I did not become a fully qualified eskimo.....read below;)...went alright, although the next day my left shoulder was hurting and my inner thighs too.....but it was last nights bike ride with Lee & Ian that nearly sent me to my grave! I crashed no less than three times, and all three times I was very lucky not do myself a mischief! We all fell off as it goes. Our excuse being that it was pitch black & freezing cold, very very damp under tyre and we were all aching quite a bit from the kayaking the night before! My arm was killing me and my shoulder wasn't quite normal. My ankles on the other hand (foot?) were great to me and felt strong (quite remarkable considering they were as restless as a couple of snakes on speed in bed the night before), although the ulcer that has erupted on the side of my tongue made me frown the whole time!
My worst crash (my first of the evening) was caused by aquiring a double puncture blasting down a particularly fast bit of singletrack running alongside Wolverns Lane, with high edges forcing you into the quite rocky & very narrow middle! On the right side you have very thick brambles and half foot wide wooden posts and on the left the same, with a barbed wire fence on the otherside of the brambles separating a herd of cows from the looney cyclists that frequent this part of the countryside. So there I was first in line and wallop!....My tyre has gone all squadgy and throws me off line, up the right side edge and naturally I lean to the left but it is useless as I try and stay up right. I end up in the brambles on my left side narrowly missing the barbed wire and the wooden post! It was a relatively soft landing except the brambles that acted as my bed for the next 20 seconds managed to strangle various parts of my body....seven in all! And I had two holes in my innertube to fix. Lee & Ian did most of that for me as I recovered from my fall and noticed we had an audience! Right up against and peering through the darkness over the wire fence were a bunch of cows...the black & white kind...and were probably saying to each other 'The last lot of idiot mountain bikers to fall off there didn't make as much noise!' The other two falls were pretty small and slow moving and Lee & Ian's falls weren't bad either. Ians was pretty cool though! Lee & I took him to this quite technical downhill section halfway up Leith Hill and he came off and somehow managed to unclip his feet from his pedals, jump over his handle bars and catch his bike too! Then yours truly got us lost again looking for this poxy quarry and somehow managed to cycle right round the thing completely missing it! It was dark after all......& we were tired and achey and hurting remember?.....not my fault;) We got back to the car at 11pm with a 20 mile drive home to Teddington. It was however a brilliant ride of only 11.58 miles that lasted 2hrs 25mins. Good stuff......so on to Thursdays kayak rolling course....

Fancy a roll? Mmmmm! Sounds nice eh? A nice bread roll.....white & perhaps a little crusty, a little butter (real butter....slightly salted), your favorite filling...maybe coronation chicken or some tuna or egg mayonaise (not mine)......perhaps even a bit of chicken breast and salad or my favorite.....grated cheese & chopped red onions? It's your choice bloggers & bloggettes.
But that ain't the kind of roll I am talking about! Oh no! The sort I am talking about is a rather different kind of roll altogether. For a start it is as soggy as a recently beached childs teddy bear and not anywhere near as upsetting. Also, this kind of roll has a completely different kind of filling too.....the filling in of forms in case I end up dead....Questions like; Do you suffer from diabetes? No! Do you suffer from epilepsy? No! Do you suffer from asthma? No!........What kind of roll is this! Do you suffer from angina? No! Have you ever had a stroke or heart attack? Not as far as I can remember (although I do like to stroke myself sometimes;)! Have I any allergies? No, but I would almost certainly sneeze if you through pepper in my face! Are you prone to blackouts or fainting? No, but if you punched me too hard or showed me a woman with three breasts I would quite happily blackout or indeed faint! Have you ever had any shoulder injuries? No! (Completely ignoring the several quite heavy crash landings I have had from cycling like a nutcase through Richmond Park over the last year). Have you ever suffered from a bad back or neck? No! Fitness wise how would you describe yourself? Unfit?....Average?....fit? Well, technically I am above average in fitness but due to my knackered ankle joints and dickie right elbow, I am going to put down average! Are you on any medication? er......I think I am going to put down....No! I just can't be bothered with writing all those funny names that mostly end in VIR! Is there any other medical condition or disability, which could affect your ability to partake in the kayaking course that you are booked for? er.....well.....apart from an injury to my right arm years ago.....No.....None! I thought I had better put down the right elbow thing in case he saw how different my arm looked compared to my left arm......which he did during the course....just an injury I said, but it does mean that it is much weaker than my other arm and will affect how I perform kayak rolls.........I didn't manage one.....yet! Damn! I was looking forward to becoming a fully fledged eskimo;)
Kayak Rolls! Oh.....so it is that kind of roll? I still wouldn't mind my cheese & onion roll please:)
So there we were in Gurnell Leisure Centre in Ealing, pool side at 9pm Thursday night, dragging our kayaks to the waters edge. Absolutely loads of other kayakers there too......not in our course....just four in our course and our instructor Carl who is a very good kayaker. bit of a surfer dude....very nice chap. He did his best to teach Lee & I to roll a kayak on our own but after an hour and a half spent mostly upside down, the elusive roll was nowhere to be seen. It looks easy.....but easy it ain't! The rest of the 20 odd kayakers were their just to muck around, practice rolls, various stunts they have learnt over the last god knows how many years & even partake in a little kayak polo with a football. Ian, a friend of Lee & I turned up unexpectedly with his kayak too....& he was part of the four man course that Lee & I were in.....how spooky is that! Apart from the expected failure to produce an unassissted roll we did learn a whole lot more stuff besides. So after stuffing my ear pugs in, my nose clip on, putting on my goggles & stretching my splash deck over my cockpit, paddle in hand, Lee, Ian & I launched straight into the water from the pools edge (which was great fun). Then Lee & I, with instruction from Carl, learned to rescue each other, which we had never tried before. Basically one of us capsizes and once completely upside down (which happens in a split second) you signal to your buddy to come rescue you by slapping your palms on the bottom of the kayak (just about where ones ares might be), sweeping them backwards and forwards feeling for the nose end of your buddy's boat as he positions it right by your hands. Then I grab hold of the nose and pull myself upright using my hip & torso to help flick the boat upright.....hey presto! Saved and didn't even get my legs wet! In fact I didn't get my legs wet for the entire length of the course, and I must have capsized (all self-induced of course) about 50 times. But what I did find is that whoever rescues me must come to my left hand (the one with my watch strapped around it) or I just wouldn't have the strength to right myself. Fortunately I can hold my breath for quite a long time from all the cycling I do. I think my right arm was hampering me quite a bit too when I was trying proper rolls using the paddle! I shall just have to go back and try again.
Either way, I & Lee shall definitely be going back for more tutoring or even just an hour and a halfs mucking around once a week. Beats going to the gym and soooo much warmer than the river Thames at the moment too. I do need the upper body strength that kayaking gives you and will stand me in good stead for the (hopefully) vast amount of kayaking I will be getting up to this year. Cycling doesn't seem to give your upper body much of a workout.....but I bet it does considering how much my arm hurts during and particularly after a good ride! But not enough.
There is definitely something very appealing about paddling your own kayak in a nice warm swimming pool. The lights shine down on you all, making your kayak look even more colourful than it is. The beautiful clear water......no current.....no tide....no dead fish.....no moody fishermen.....no gigantic pleasure cruisers making two foot high waves at you, no wind, and if it rains.......you're indoors. I liked it....a lot! But not as much as a nice clear lake in North Wales or Lulworth Cove on a calm day. But while I am at least a 2hr drive from a decent bit of coast or a snazzy lake......a swimming pool and the Thames will have to do.



Jason

P.s. Happy Birthday Ros:)






(C) JPT 2007.........845.64 miles.

This Is London...

My London....yesterday.


See that tower on the horizon in the photograph? That is the BT Tower in central London.......formerly known as the London Telecom Tower & The Post Office Tower. It kind of looks like a giant robots penis! Or a very large space rocket.....same thing right;) 620ft high......lucky robot! I took that yesterday (Wednesday....a third of my way round a 31 mile bike ride.....from inside Richmond Park. I see that view every time I cycle in RP and have only just thought of actually photographing it. It look even better at night. I think it is about 8 and a half miles away from where I am standing.....in a straight line. You can even see the tower from the end of my Mums road (The Meadway in Twickenham). They reckon that if you hit the tower straight down into the ground with a gigantic hammer.......Australia would fly up in the air and spin uncontrollably into space! I can't even imagine that! But it must be true?
It has a revolving restaurant right at the very top which was open to the public, but closed in 1980...and in 1971 the mens toilets were bombed by The Angry Brigade........Obviously angry that they ran out of loo roll whilst taking a dump;)
A long time ago, when I was about nine? My Dad wrote a letter to Jim'll Fix it and asked if his son (me) could abseil down the side of the building. My Dad never got a reply and has subsequently never been able to forgive Jim for that!
I'm not surprised that they didn't reply! A man asks if his nine year old Haemophiliac son can abseil down the side of the Post Office Tower! They must have thought my Dad was a nutter! I could of done it though. I could still do it today if I was allowed. Heights don't bother me in the least.....But bombs do! Especially bombs in toilets!!! And even more especially if I am taking a dump on it when it explodes!!!!!!
So, 31 miles later and I was at home and running a nice hot bath. Grabbed a couple of litres of cold mineral water out of the fridge together with an ice cold Cobra lager....0% alcohol.....very tasty! Jumped in the bath.....i-pod plugged into the portable stereo and relax.......after ten minutes I am sweating like a pig, sweat running down my face tickling my skin and dripping from my nose and into the bubbly hot water.....sweat running down my back too...tickling even more than the face. Time to sit back and relax proper. A swig of ice cold lager......sit up, hoping my thighs don't cramp up from the ride.....shuffle forward a few inches until my head is beneath the high upside down U shaped tap and on goes the cold.....right over my head...quickly sit up and let the freezing water run over my boiling hot face, neck & shoulders. Sooooo refreshing! More lager......lay back down.....music playing in my ears.....relax......go over an eskimo roll in my head ready for tomorrows course.....hot.....sweat.....drink.....sit up.....tap......cold......BBBrrrrrrr....freezing.....drink......relax.....music....etc, etc. Every single one of my baths are exactly like this.......except the eskimo roll part. Normally I fall asleep or think of interesting things to do when I am out of the bath or what to have for dinner or think to myself....'Aren't hot baths supposed to help excruciatingly painful joints feel better?.'
Wish Lee & I luck in our eskimo roll course tomorrow (tonight now) at Ealing swimming pool. Very exciting stuff...but a little apprehensive as to wether I will be able to actually do one! They look so easy watching it being done on YouTube.......But I know it isn't going to be! At least we can take our own kayaks along. If you don't see another post by the weekend........I Love you all..........Peace:)



Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........834.06 miles.

"Little Marks & Indentations"

Being spent.....or not, as the case may be.


Why does that pill container sat atop my bedside drawer unit, awaiting 08:27 for it's impending but rather short trip from said position on drawer to the dry lips of my parched mouth absolutely have to point in a very certain direction? And why when I throw the used container into my Tupperware container for re-filling, situated on the counter right next to my fridge does it have to land or at the very least leave my sight as it falls in a certain direction?
I know why and I know what to do to not have to do it anymore..........All I have to do is change the colour of the thing...one end of it anyway. The yellow end is the sole reason that I do this in the first place. It has to be facing away from me. The other end is blue and doesn't even register....except that it isn't yellow of course. So why then can't I do something about it?
I really couldn't tell you......I don't know myself! And why the yellow end? Why the colour yellow? Jaundice is the reason why! My doctors must have said something about Hepatitis causing it sometimes. Or I may have read somewhere or saw it on the news or saw someone with yellowish skin and learned that they had liver disease. It was a few years ago now.......when I was first told of my Hep C virus. It has stuck like hot shit to a warm bed sheet! Like all my other "O.C.D's" that I have collected over the last few decades.......they are very sticky, but like everything in life, there are subtle changes in the rituals, habits, mild addictions.......whatever you want to call them.

My kayak (the one I have had ten years) is yellow. It doesn't effect me. It doesen't have to face in a particular direction in my garage.....that might be because it can only go one way and I have no choice but to hang it in that way and soon forget about it. But the sponge in my bathroom is yellow (I use it to dry my bath after I have rinsed it down). It has for a long time reminded me of a liver......an infected liver......my liver.....it has little holes in it like the damaged surface of a liver. I could change the colour of it and maybe my 'ritual' with that might go away. All the way through tx I used to imagine it was my liver and each time I dried my bath down with it, I used to nurse it and imagine it was healing as I squeezed all the water out of it thinking it was the virus. But before I could put it back on the metal shower rack thing hanging below the shower all squeezed out, I had to fully soak it with the shower head until all the surface was a dark yellow and then squeeze as much water out from it until it looked dry again. The little individual lines of water extendnding from the shower head making the sponge look as though it had scars across it as I passed the shower across the surface of the sponge. I had to completely soak it until they all went......then I would wring it out and place it back on the rack, the same way around as always..........I still do this 'ritual' today! Everytime I shower! It won't go away! I can't change the sponge to a different colour......in case something bad happens!

They got me by the balls alright! But at least they have changed over the years.....my other ones. Maybe this one will and the pill container one will and the..........My god! There are so many when I think about it! Best not to think about them I suppose. I even thought that writing this post would make some of them go away. But having come to the end of this post now, I don't feel any different. Best keep them where I can see them I suppose.....instead of trying to throw them away.
Imagine the mess if I tried to do that!

Imagine a large cup full of penny's.....all nice and cosy....all in one place....all within a very comfortable distance to me. Then imagine if I didn't want them anymore and no one else would take them. They were all bent and dirty, scratched & dented...some were foreign...others weren't even coins at all......maybe the odd one was a bright, clean beautiful looking penny......but look! It has been with all those other dirty ones! Such a shame! Leave it......leave them all!
So I throw them away instead....as far as I can. With all my might I swing the quite heavy cup around my body, fingers gripping tight and see the hundreds of coins leave the cup all at different times......The metalic swishing sound as they slip from the smooth, safe confines of their cardboard haven.....into the air and scattered like copper raindrops in a hurricane all over the place! Tinkling, clattering, rolling, Lost and frightened! The empty cup in my hand....bottomless.....little marks & indentations where the coins used to lie and dream of something else. Only to wish they were back in that cup now!
I look at the metalic wreckage all around me....the sound of smashed coins on concrete still ringing in my ears.....some are still rolling about trying to find a new life. They don't want this.....they want back in their cup....where they were safe...where they were looked after and were thought about and cared for. They are nothing now all on their own! I am nothing also!

I will never throw away my coins!



Jason


Happy Birthday Mum, Millie & Daisy.......in that order:) I had a great time at the farm with you guys.....the whole weekend was very nice:)






(C) JPT 2007.........803.17 miles.

"Kisses of a Blood Filled Spring"

Me on a bike.....finally!


Kisses one through nine...Nine Common Pheasants (all male).........alive.....creeping about in the woods looking for god knows what the dozy twats (probably a little bit of nooky). You'd think they'd be more elegant and aware of themselves considering how beautiful they look with their multi-coloured plumages. The colours.....how many colours? Their 'Lady' attracting capabilities must be quite good, although I saw not one female at all. They must have been somewhere else in the woods......maybe sunning themselves in the wonderful sunshine that poured itself over the North Downs yesterday.

Kiss ten...Oh....& I saw one dead one on the side of the road, the sun making his tiny exposed guts glisten like a small pile of red coloured crushed Christmas tree baubles in amongst a scattering of multi-coloured feathers......squashed flat as a pancake! Dozy idiots!

Kisses eleven, twelve, thirteen & fourteen...Four sun Loving Bumble-Bees, bumbling along sniffing out nice things to sniff and pretty flowers to lick. Low to the ground, heavy looking and even a little drunk looking perhaps....maybe still asleep as they bumble around knocking into everything. I like Bumble-Bees. They remind me of my old dead cat 'Dylan'. He used to bumble around (mostly asleep) and lick things.....mostly his winky....& he was a heavy little lump too, & when he smelled something nice his little dry black nose would bounce up and down a little, raising a few millimetres with each sniff as though he might sneeze at any moment. I am sure he went boss-eyed too. And just like a Bumble-Bee he was a furry little bundle and very cuddly. But he could also sting too (like a bee), he had claws as big and as sharp as a bloody lions! He's asleep in my Mums back garden now, wrapped up in an old (and quite collectable) HitchHikers Guide to the Galaxy towel. He died in it.

A whole bunch of little, twitching, scratchy kisses...More Squirells & bunny rabbits than I can even possibly remember......cute and funny too.....especially the bunnies as they run like nutters as you approach them, like in the films when a man on foot is being chased by a car, he usually runs down the road instead of into the trees. Thats what the rabbits do, until they quickly realize and dart off into the woods, their hind legs wheel spinning like a dragster at the start of a quarter mile strip. They're fast buggers.......very fast! How many of those things do you see dead beside the road? I have seen more badgers than bunnies chalked up on the "Road Kill Chefs" menu.

So many kisses I nearly wet my pants...A very beautiful cemetery filled with numerous gravestones covered in decades old moss and surrounded by a veritable bevvy of Daffodils.....each one more yellow than the one beside it. Each one with her mouth wide open as if to say 'Oooh, what a beautiful day.........give me a kiss.'

Most of the remainding kisses...Of course, I saw a herd of cows in a field....wouldn'e be a day out in the countryside if I hadn't. Chewing on........something. Not sure what considering they were all in a dirt field. Maybe they chew all the time, a natural reaction, wether they are eating or not (like my Dad)......waiting for some grass to go in there. Or maybe they had just finished the last blade of grass in the field right before I saw them.....come to think of it, they did look a little bloated. Speaking of my Dad, I did see a longish line of elderly 'Ramblers' inching their way across a tiny section of my route, all wearing very sensible looking coats.......sensible for their high street shopping rambles maybe, but not I think for in the middle of nowhere in the countryside. The lead rambler had a very Lovely looking piece of kit hanging around his neck......an OS map safely tucked away behind a thick, clear waterproof map reading pouch. I suppose they could all jump into that if it started to piss down with rain.

Not a kiss as such, but quite entertaining nonetheless...A small.....very small traffic jam that was in what must be the smallest village in the entire world. It (the traffic jam) consisted of a local bus (empty of passengers) coming one way and a school coach (filled with school children) coming the other and one car behind the school coach.....thats it! The coach was slowly, but obviously reversing back so the bus could go by but the car couldn't have seen that the coach being in it's reverse mode had actually wanted to go backwards? And just sat there waiting for the traffic jam to disappear. Until the coach driver sent a group of the children out into the road to run to the back of the coach to the driver of the car and ask her politely to reverse away fro the reversing coach......which she did. The children jumped back into the coach and within seconds the village was back to normal again......literally three or four houses, one shop, a church, a bench and a pub.....oh, & a litter bin. I didn't see a post box, although there must have been one right? To give you an idea of how small the village actually is.......if Twickenham exploded one day and you took a single piece of the millions of tons of rubble that was spread all over the ground.....you'd be holding onto Peaslake.

And lastly my biggest kiss of all...A mouth filled with blood for half the entire day! It honestly felt as though I had been sucking on a lump of black pudding (blood sausage in the US) the whole time.......slowly letting it dissolve in my cheek until there is no more room left in my grotty mouth for my allocated amount of saliva for the afternoon and my lips start to look like the bright red lips of Elvira.......or those of Robert Smith from The Cure. Not sure what was going on there! I bit my tongue in the night, which bloody hurt, but the bleeding was coming from the otherside of my mouth. It didn't hurt but after an hour began to make me feel miserable.....a little. It seems to have stopped now......so I will leave it. But for some reason........I feel quite miserable still! Might be my ankles....the bruise & blood in my gob....the painful big boil thing that has appeared out of nowhere on my lower back....my right elbow....the sore spot on my upper lip....the scab from last Wednesdays cycle crash feeling rather quite sore....being woken at 08:10am today from a vast & lengthy quantity of hammering....or it may be that I get like this at times.....for no reason at all really.

Oh.......did I mention that I was out on my bike during all of those kisses? The photo at the top of this post with me on my bike may have been a bit of a give away..........22.02 miles in great weather.....those hills are drying out nicely and are getting faster & faster & faster:)

I'm off out for a ride!.........(update....a very painful one!) BOLLOCKS!



Jason







(C) JPT.........754.09 miles.

"Ample Pulling Power"

Part one of a very special journey.....The Beginning...

Dedicated to Ample, UC & Tea.........& to all other passengers taking this special journey.


What am I doing, am I mad......mad as a hatter?
What have I done, am I done as well as can be?
I done my bit, quite elegantly too some might say.
Is it quite enough though this tiny section of my Life?
Will good prevail over bad, or will bad stick like shit?
Pulling this poison from my body, has it helped?
Poison kills poison.....Violence more Violence more like!
Not for me, but for some, more than some.....most!
Just how lucky has this poison been for me?
Just how bad has it been to others?......still being bad!
What do I do now? Wait.....more waiting? For what?
It will either be good or bad......Not in between?
No in betweens here I am afraid!
You either did or you did not!
You either will or you will not!
Out of your hands girl!
The pulling is over now......no more pushing just to pull.
Just how much have I managed to pull out from my body?
Pull? More like pleasantly eased.
Easy for me to say......Easy!
Not all easy.....not even for me!
Certainly not for others!
We are all pulling, pushing to pull......like distant locomotives.
Feeding coal into the fire.....more steam.
Tending to the controls.....not over pulling those levers.
It takes time. One has to wait for good things right?
Just how long is anyones guess.
One thing is for sure though.
The end will arrive wether we like it or not.....it always does!

Part two of a very special journey.........The End...


Jason







(C) JPT 2007

Miles & Miles & Miles...& a tiny bit of kayaking too.

Three feet above the roads surface and not a car in sight....not a dry car anyway;)


What a great weekends cycling (see bottom of post to see explanation for kayak photo). And to boot, the weather was absolutely perfect and hopefully a sign of things to come for the rest of the year. Well it's been a long time coming but after weeks and months of low pressure dominated weather, we are now beginning to see the first signs of a pattern change with high pressure becoming the dominant weather type. Has spring finally sprung? It seems like it and the rest of the week looks to be pretty nice too. Those soggy, sponge-like hills are going to be well drained by mid week if this dry weather continues and Wednesday, they (the hills) will be very happy to hear that I will be uponing my pressence on the backs of their much appreciated slopes in the form of some quite pleasurable mileages.

But for now, I think I have covered enough miles this weekend and may do a little kayaking tomorrow & maybe a little cycle ride on Tuesday instead.....just to warm up my skinny & scabby legs.
Since 7pm on Friday evening, I have covered a total of 86 miles during three rides.....all local to where I live and everyone different from the last. The first ride on Friday was alongside my friend Lee & our old friend Ian Davidson, who we last went mountain biking with last summer in a place called Swinley Forest near Bracknell. That was the day that Lee's work boss Martin split his head open and Lee & I had to meet the ambulance and direct it back to where the crash had occured (in the middle of nowhere & miles from anyone). That was a very long day and the temperature was in the 30's! I was bang in the middle of my Hep C treatment (not that that made any difference), but it just seems like such a long time ago.
Anyway, Martin was fine in the end....needed stitches etc and didn't come out cycling for a while.....quite a long while as it goes. This crash was what prompted me to start wearing a cycle helmet. I never leave home without it now.....when I am on my bike.
So Lee & I followed Ian around the very edge of Richmond Park all of it totally off-road and also totally illegal & ridiculously muddy! But it was dark and we were on a mission. It is three miles longer than going around the legal way and three times as bloody muddy too! If I want mud, I will go up to the hills and get me some there.....it's less sticky & has less doggem poo's in it too. It was fun though, although Lee found it hard going as he doesn't get out as much as me for obvious reasons. But having said that, he should be very proud of his acheivments (you reading this Lee?).
Right near the end of our naughty loop a fallen branch flicked up from this leafy, branch littered downhill part and was pulled into the gap between my forks and spokes! I heard the branch smash to pieces as my spokes made mince meat of the woody windfall and I stopped to see if it had knocked off my trip computer sensor that is attatched to my forks........it had and was nowhere in sight! It was pitch black (the sensor is black too) and we only had our bike lights to see with......over a stretch of about 20yds. Leaves & branches strewn everywhere...the park was about to close and be locked up for the night as the Deer are being culled this time of year. But we found it and the rubber piece that goes with it. The two cable ties that held it on were gone forever and I slipped the thing into my pocket (fortunately I knew the mileage from where it fell off back to Lee's so I could easily add them on) and rushed to the gate to avoid being locked in with a truck full of the Queens trigger happy Deer cullers! It was unlocked still and Lee & I went back to Twickenham to the Maple Leaf Pharmacy to collect a prescription of much needed pain killers for yours truly:) Ian went off back to his place up Richmond Hill for another nine months I suppose. He has a 100k mountain bike race in Portugal in April.......lets hope he survives it.....he is a bit of a maniac.
Lee & I got my sensor fixed back on and all is well again on the mileage front. Cheers Lee:) Then I washed my bike at 10pm by my garage ready for the next day. It was absolutely covered in the stuff! Like clay it was! Fridays mileage came to 21 miles exactly.

Then the very next day (Saturday) I was out for another ride and this time I met up with a fellow Blogger Warriorwomen and met her at Bushy Park at 10:00am right after her Time Trial run that she has been entering the last several Saturdays (quite early for me usually, but one look out the window and up into the beautiful blue sky & I was ready). You can read her great blog over in my "Family & Friend's Blogs" section over on the right hand side. Her latest post has a cool map of where we cycled together from Bushy Park to Richmond Park. It was a wonderful day again and the sun was shining the whole day. There was a bit of a breeze some of the way and the park (RP) was absolutely packed with walkers, cyclists and runners. We are so lucky to have something like this right on our doorsteps. WW, it was a pleasure to ride with you and I look forward to showing you around the Surrey Hills soon:)
After we split up after our ride, I went round the park for another lap and then went home......boy was I exhausted. I even contemplated having a mid-afternoon nap but though better of it and went to pump up my friend Jacs tyres & adjust her brakes and went shopping to Waitrose also to get some much needed bananas & hummus. Then it was over at my Mums with Daisy to eat take-away food and watch the great "Primeval" on TV. My Mum is recovering very well after her knee op.....still in pain, but recovering nonetheless. Saturdays mileage came to a total of 32.43 miles.

Then on to today....Sunday. Another glorious day (better get out in it before it all goes tits up so to speak;) and another ride in the sun. I even contemplated going up to the hills but decided not to as I will be spending the day there on Wednesday. So instead I did BP and RP again with a little diversion halfway through to Hampton to see my Twin Nicola and her Hubby Lee working on their new house. Loads of work going on over there! It's gonna look fantastic when it is finished.
The rest of the ride saw me in RP again and it was even more busy than on Saturday. It was nice and dry and therefore quite fast:) It's quite taxing on the old nerves though, as you are forever looking out for other people! As you can imagine, there is a lot of braking and speeding off again. I saw Pete Townshend from "The Who" again up on Richmond Hill.....one of these days I might even see him with a guitar over his shoulder;) Todays mileage came to a total of 32.80 miles.

I am pretty much done for this weekend and look forward to a day off tomorrow for a spot of kayaking in the afternoon.....hopefully in the sun. My inner thighs keep threatening to cramp up and my right elbow has had enough as have both my ankle joints! The funny thing is is that I only took one photo over the whole of the weekend (today)! And that was of a bench up behind the back of the Royal Star & Garter home. But I can't use it for this post as I have it saved specially for another post. The photo I did add I took on Thursday night in Twickenham when I went out in my new kayak for the first time on my own! It was pretty scary as the river was so fast and high.....as you can see from the photo and the street sign being almost submerged! I paddled around Eel Pie Island three times & just generally mucked around in the water where there are usually roads and tarmac for an hour & a half or so. It was great fun and the boat is a dream to paddle and is much easier to lift on my own. I could eat it:)
Oh.....did I mention that on the 22nd March Lee & I have a course in kayak rolling (eskimo roll) over at Ealing swimming pool. Much needed training I think, just in case I fall in the river! So much more likely in this tiny new kayak! I will tell you all about it after the course.



Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........717.58 miles.

"The Young Engineer"

A road to nowhere......literally, as this road sign (taken today) means DEAD END! The next road along from mine in Teddington. My road is a dead end too (next stop the Thames) but I didn't want to use my road sign in this post! I can't tell if this dream I had last night is a really good dream or a really horrible one? Either way it upset me!


The four year old girl was trying with her utmost patience & innocent professionalism to get the scooter started that was up on it's centre stand, comfortably parked over a dried puddle of motor oil that had leaked into the ground of the bare front garden of a grubby looking house on one corner to a main road at the end of a very long, straight side road. Her tiny figure looked very odd perched atop this towering machine, the girls little legs barely reaching past the bottom of the saddle, but she also looked completely at home with her eager face showing a great determination to get the engine up & running. Her Mum was standing by her side watching her daughters concentrating hands as she tried pushing the start button and twisting the throttle. My friend Lee & I were walking past them towards the corner of the main road as we looked over to witness them and this strange spectacle.....

Then out of the corner of my eye I saw what looked like a Mini car drive past us at a great amount of speed down towards the main road from the end of the side road, with no signs of slowing down. There weren't any sounds of a highly charged engine nor did the thing make a crashing sound as the car proceeded to drive at top speed through a gap in the moving traffic on the main road and into the house directly opposite and disappeared without so much as a speck of brick dust or the tinkling of shattering glass or the crushing, twisting sound of grinding metal & human weight forced together.....the curtians hanging inside the window frame being sucked in behind it momentarily revealing a very long tunnel of wreckage stretching into the distance the exact same shape as a small car. The curtains flopped back down to their original position and it looked as though nothing had happened. The steady stream of traffic the car had crossed through kept moving......oblivious to the high speed metal injection that just took place between their protective cocoons! I calmly asked Lee if he saw it.....the car pass through the window.....he couldn't say for sure if he had. Then I heard the sound of a tiny engine rev into life and upon looking up, noticed the girl on the vespa had managed to start it. Her smile spoke absolute volumes......eyes wide like saucers....her arms went up as she punched the air. She looked around feeling very clever & grown up at an imaginary crowd of people gathered to see this impressive display of kiddie engineering. She expected to see big smiles, clapping hands & cheers of admiration.....only to see that she was alone......all except for her Mum....who was looking right at me! Her eyes were boring holes into my face and her expression was of the most serious & frightening kind that exists. She was the Mini drivers Mother.

I knew the driver had mental problems and was addicted to heroin or some such chemical life-line.....as was his mother. The child sitting atop the newly revitalized motorcycle, knew absolutely nothing of the drug use inside of her precious family, nor of the awful damage that it had caused to her Loved ones ability to think straight over the years, but she knew there was something terribly, terribly wrong!



Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........652.36 miles.

"Ankle Bloody Ankle"

Check out my Medic-Alert bracelet on my right arm.........fortunately, I didn't need it today.....but I do think it makes me go faster;)


Another boring cycling post? You betcha!

Sponge; A material used for it's massive water holding capabilities. Also known for it's uncanny knack for holding onto a relatively small amount of water and slowly but surely relieving itself all down the side of a hill or hills or a large mound or mounds for the entire, non-stop, sun-shiny length of the whole bloody goddamn day......without fail! Me thinks it may have rained in the previous night.....just an itsy-witsy bit perhaps;)

I name that hill or hills; Holmbury Hill, Pitch Hill & Winterfold Woods Hill! I should know! I cycled over the bastard things today......twice! And at the furthest point away from the car, about 9 miles, I was cycling back up a stream that I had come down not just ten minutes before......thats right, an actual stream that is sign posted as a public right of way (the only thing missing were a line of fishermen telling me to bugger off)......And decided to try my luck over what looked like a more shallow section of the stream than the rest and ended up sinking front wheel first in over two feet of freezing cold water! It certainly didn't look that deep. In fact I could see that the bottom of the river looked like compacted sand and was about six inches under the waters surface. But what I quickly found out was that the compacted sand was in actual fact......as soft and as liquid as the water above it! Down I went......almost head first in the cold water! If it wasn't for my front wheel getting stuck the deeper it went in the silt, I would have gone in head first! I wasn't cycling fast thank goodness, as it was up hill. With the wheel stuck in the silty bottom meant I had quite a good grip on the bars to stop myself from taking a dive. Instead, I naturally put my right leg out and into the same deep water.........right up to the middle of my thigh! It totally surprised me as I really thought it was quite shallow. But as I started to cycle away back up the downwards flowing stream (more like a brook really), I looked down and saw that there was a little blood seeping from the inside of my right ankle! It was soon soaking into my sock and shoe. I didn't even feel it as the water was so cold! I stopped to investigate the wound to see how deep it was. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that it wasn't very deep at all and after taking a few photos of it, I continued back up to the top and made my way back to Pitch Hill and then Holmbury Hill. Basically back the same way that I had come by earlier. All I can think is that there was something hidden under the surface of the silt, maybe an old branch or a small rock or even a just slightly lost Pirhana! I stopped briefly at the tiny village of Peaslake right outside the General Store they have there and had a well deserved drink whilst I watched the young woman who works in there taking what looked like a freshly baked tray of suasage rolls & pastys:) Two other mountain bikers were sat there too, resting from a day of hard days slog by the look of their bikes and faces. They were the only other cyclists I saw in four hours of riding (unlike at the weekend when you can come across about thirty or so in an hour or two. I remember looking at my watch to see what the time was and as soon as I looked away from it, one of the cyclists asked me if they didn't mind telling them the time. I had looked just seconds before and could not for the life of me remember what it said! I had to look again......nearly 16:45pm. I had been out cycling since 13:15. But according to my computer, I had rested or stopped for photographs & ate etc for approximately 1hr 20 mins. It was a tough one today and I got lost.....took the wrong turning should I say;).....a couple of times and had to back track a few times too. Some of the route today was new to me and I was just getting my bearings;) It was fun though, as usual. But I think it would be better to wait a little while before I go back......until the hills that seem to be permenantly bloated with rain has drained away. Unless of course I feel like a little water and a lot of mud again;)
The sun was beginning to set now and I still had the whole of Holmbury Hill to conquer for the second time but in reverse. I made my way up the side of BKB (on the road), having cycled down it properly earlier, to the covered reservoir and up to the top of Telegraph Row. I had already been up it right at the beginning of my ride, and I eventually came out just before the youth hostel in Holmbury St Mary and took a sharp right down an interesting steepish piece of single track, being careful to avoid the roots and eventually came out by my car. Phew! What a long day......& I only did 18 miles! Thats an hour and ten minutes longer than my total cycling time (without stops) compared to 18 miles around Richmond Park near where Iive. It just goes to show the difference in terrain.
A typical 18 mile ride around RP takes me 1hr 20 mins (2hrs 35 today). Total time in RP 1hr 27mins (3hrs 50 mins today). Average speed in RP 13mph (7mph today). And I much prefer the hills and the mud and the steep ups and the steep downs and the roots and the puddles and the........dare I say it......the blood too;) Of course I would have much prefered not to have bled, but at least the mud kept it clean.....ish.
I stopped by the the car for several minutes and washed down my leg with a whole bottle of mineral water. It had changed from a beautiful bright red colour to a rather mucky mass of clotted dark red goo! I was surprised to see that underneath the filth were two smallish wounds in the shape of an upside down V. I will spare you the horrific sight of my ankle and thought I would just add this pic I took of myself (see above) right before I washed the wound and drove the 20 miles back home to a nice hot bath. But if you are a vampire......look at my right ankle and enjoy;)

Ankle Bloody Ankle? It was nice to have a problem with it and not be in pain for once. Ok, it did sting a bit when I got into the bath, but I assure you that it is fine now;)



Jason






(C) JPT 2007.........631.36 miles.

Forth & Back & Back & Forth & Back...

A rare head & shoulders shot of me. At least I am hidden slightly by muddy spots, removable hair (helmet) and an extortionate amount of stubble!


What's the word.......where you can't decide on the right choice? I am sometimes......so....? What is it I am trying to think of? Some people tell me I am so.....ahhhh....what is it? This isn't even funny! I get this sometimes when I am writing a post....often actually, but very rarely type it out! There is a joke where the end goes 'But now I'm not so sure.' I used to be really......(sits thinking like a bloody madman.....even rings his friend Jac).....in.....really indecisive! Thats the one! I just could not think of that bloody god damn word!
Right, where was I?.....Oh yes, I went out for a bike ride on Saturday afternoon and couldn't for the life of me decide wether to wear shorts or my long cycling trouser tight thingies. For half an hour of feeling this crushing ambivalent (thats a good word too.....thanks Jac) feeling.....All ready (except for the leg wear), having checked the weather (very English) on Metcheck, looked out the window more than once and eager to get out in the sun and get some mud on my chops and some fresh air deep down into my lungs, I decided to wear my long trousers after all. To say that I was completely decided is a small understatement to say the least. As soon as I stepped out of my front door, I was still not sure wether I had made the right choice or not. In fact, in the back of my mind, I knew I was making a mistake! It was far to mild for shorts......I have made this mistake plenty of times in the past. I don't quite know how I manage it to be honest. I mean how difficult can it be to know more or less what to wear for a bike ride?
The sun was mostly out and Metcheck claimed that the temp would be about 8-10 degrees with the wind speed at around 13mph for the afternoon. Pretty perfect conditions for shorts....on a bike. But why didn't I think this myself? Because it's me perhaps?
All the way from my flat to Twickenham Riverside, two miles, I was thinking I ought to turn around.....I didn't. All the way from Twickenham Riverside to Richmond Bridge, two miles, (via the Thames tow-path) I was thinking I ought to turn around.....I did. So I found myself back home (another eight miles), wondering what the hell was wrong with me, changing into shorts and also (after thinking my top was too warm too) a thinner one. I was wet with sweat and topped up my already depleting water bottle as I got back onto my still shining bike. So there I was starting all over again and with 8 miles already under my belt. Back along the roads to Twickenham Riverside, past the partly sun covered York House Gardens, then the White Swan Public House where I came across a group of about 50 cyclists heading in the same direction as me. They all had loads of dried mud up their backs & I wondered where they had been. I on the other hand, was totally sparkling having just washed my bike the day before. It wouldn't last long! I managed to weave through them all in the flick of an eye. I was on a roll so to speak and although I would Love to have joined them to see where they were headed, I had a ride of my own to do and made my way back to Richmond Bridge. I felt so much more comfortable now with my lighter gear on and found I wasn't going to stop for anything now. So after 12 miles, I was back by the bridge in Richmond ready to carry on properly......Silly boy eh;)
I crossed the bridge and went back along the Thames in the same direction that I had just come from. As I made my way back along to the bottom of Nightingale Lane, I saw on the opposite side of the river the 50 & odd cyclists heading for the bridge. I never saw them again. I thought I might see them in RP. I can't think for the life of me where they went. But the park is quite big I suppose and I was in, around and back out in about forty minutes.

The state of my bike after 36 miles riding in the wet and silty trails of the Queens Parks on Saturday. To think I had washed it the day before! It really feels great getting mucky.....you should try it;)

Did my usual lap of the park and feeling refreshed and cool. Then about a third of the way round it poured down! From absolutely nowhere came this massive sheet of rain and completely drenched the ground as far as the eye could see. Along with several other park users, I found a rather thick and ancient looking tree of my very own with bark like the skin a thousand year old dinosaur. It even had a little bark covered seat shaped bulge protruding from the base, right on the opposite side to where the wind was coming from.....Perfick. I sat down and got out my ginger cake and a small bar of dark chocolate for energy and watched the runners & cyclists willing to brave the elements and carry on regardless. Then as quick as it had come over.....the sun was back out, smearing a gigantic rainbow across the bright blue sky. Beautiful stuff. Then as the recently dumped rain found it's way through the thick branches of the tree I had taken up residence under, thick globules of water began to fall from the tree and fall asleep in my chocolate bar. I got back on my bike and continued through the light rain that was made up from the remnants of the disappearing cloud, looking behind me every thirty seconds or so to see the colourful injection the sky was having. Looking ahead I was almost blinded from the suns reflection onto the fresh water streaming down the path towards me. Within minutes my bike & I were covered in spots of mud, I could see hundreds of them, each one filled with the suns light, flicking up from my front tyre like rain in reverse.........I immediately felt at home.
Homewards bound now, I stopped briefly to take a photo of myself on the short but fast downhill track behind the Royal Star & Garter Home. Then back exactly the way I came and when I reached Teddington Lock & the studios, just half a mile from where I live, I decided to continue to Bushy Park via Kingston Bridge & Hampton Court Palace and do a partial lap there too. It was too early to go home, the sun was still shining......Basically, I wasn't done!
By the time I had arrived back home & after a mostly cool 36.02 miles, I was covered in dried mud spots and out of food and drink too. I felt great the whole time......even the indecisive parts......I think......I'm not sure;)

Saturday night in my Mums garden with Daisy.

Then after a hot bath at home.....too hot (as always), a healthy chicken Shish kebab with my youngest Sister Tania, Daisy and my Mum who was in a rather large amount of pain from her successful knee op (who all had Chinese take-away), Daisy & I went and stood out side in the back garden in the pitch black staring up at the sky. It was clear and nippy too. We spoke about how mind boggling the universe is and how cool the Earths shadow was when we saw it begin to creep across the surface of the Moon. We even decided that if we held up a large enough object that we would see it's shadow also on the Moon. But we soon found out that our waving arms were too small and insignificant and that my Mums garden shed was far too heavy to lift between us.......so we just thought about the shadow instead;)
I must have taken about 40 shots and I put these three next to eachother on photoshop to show you the different stages. The first shot (from the far left) was before the shadow reached the moon. The second is about the halfway across stage and the third the moon is nearly completely covered. It still looked like the third shot as I drove home.

In complete contrast to Saturday.....Sunday was spent entirely in doors.....it was very grey, very wet, very windy & although I wanted to go out badly......something stopped me....not sure what.....maybe my grey head. I only went out my front door to put the rubbish out (at 1am Monday morning). Today will be a different story!



Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........601.39 miles.

"These aren't the dreams you're looking for"

Sunbury-on-Thames yesterday.



'Let me see your identification.'
'You don't need to see his identification.'
'We don't need to see his identification.'
'These aren't the dreams you're looking for.'
'These aren't the dreams we're looking for.'
'He can go about his business.'
'You can go about your business.'
'Move along.'
'Move along... move along.'


This post was going to be all about how since I finished treatment for Hep C back on the 7th Feb, that I just haven't seemed to have had any real dreams......ones that I can remember or even make any sense of once I wake up (& you know I Love a good dream eh). Normally if the dream is any good, I will jot down a few key words and these usually give me what I need the next day to relive the entire dream in my head. But these days I can't even manage that! But then I dreamt in the night (last night) and actually remembered a few things to write as key words. Still quite vague and bitty.....but dreams nonetheless. They will do for now. I guess my normal, vivid and highly detailed dreams of piss, death & decay will return in due course;)

My pretty useless dream...

Miniature Dolphin & Crocodiles accurately dive from the palm of my hand into smooth and crystal clear water.....no sound as they slip under. Strange Ewok type creatures sitting on tree branches spying on me! The dumped and burnt out shell of a car resting in thick snow by the side of a public footpath winding it's way through London by the Thames. The car had several men inside whom were all naked except for their socks, shoes & watches. They were engaging in a practice not too dissimilar to the act of group sex. Passers by watched as they trudged through the creaking snow by this vehicular male orgy. The car was glassless and some of the men called out for people to come join them. The whole area stunk to high heaven of wet ashes, damp, distorted metal and melted rubber. The snow was cold and piled up quite high at the edge of the path in places. I was walking my bike along with two strange women who seemed to know me. I was trying to keep my tyres inside the tracks of previous cyclists. I felt a little left out, as the women had just met each other, one having noticed some dark blue veins on her new friends chest/cleavage, she said that she new what it was and should go and get it looked at asap! Then, as I was contemplating cycling home, looking up at the sky to see whether the clouds looked liked they were going to split open and drench everyone in the whole of London, I spotted a man crouch down further up the street, his trousers were down by his ankles and he began to take a shit! A Policeman saw him and having quickly donned his hat started to run over to the pooing man to presumably offer to wipe him clean?
The dream ended with Lee, his Brother Mark and I crouching down beside the bank of the River Thames, looking into the fast left to right churn of the light green/brown water. Dead fish began to float by.....I pointed to one, a very big and rotten Bream! It was half submerged & black with death. It soon disappeared. Then as we were looking for more fish, something seemed to gather up around our backsides and slowly started to push us into the water! It felt very much like a giant gathering of duvet, soft and white. We looked at each other and had nowhere else to go but into the cold river.

I am pretty sure what triggered my new dream off. It was almost certainly my 35 minute paddle in my new kayak last night in the swollen, colourless, speeding Thames.......well a little back water off-shoot right next to the main body of the angry river! I was very nervous....mostly about tipping upside down and freezing to death & swallowing the actual water too. The water was freezing and my feet soon went numb as I stepped into the water to enter the tiny boats cockpit. This new kayak is tiny and as I learned, you can turn the thing on a sixpence! With one hardish stroke of the powerful paddle I can spin on the spot for over 360 dgrees! The tiny sliver of a back end disappears under the surface of the water and the shark nose front end skims the surface just like a thousand year old weathered pebble. I was absolutely Loving it. Lee was with me in his 14ft'er and paddled out into the main part of the Thames like know ones business.....that is how stable my other boat is. I cautiously followed and fought against the fast & determined current to a still spot that Lee found just around the corner. We took up our posistions side by side and watched the relentless flow of water gushing past us on it's watery way perhaps to flood the entire City of London! Thank goodness for the Thames estuary and the North Sea!
We took leave of our little glassy haven and headed back out into the main part of the flow only to be taken along in it's pull and swung back around to the off-shoot and hopefully to saftey. Almost no paddling required, just dibs and dabs to keep it straight. Don't look up too quick from the rising swells and currents to the waters surface or you can lose balance and your bearings! The water and the land are moving at two completely different speeds and you're right in the middle of both of them.....you just don't realize how quickly the water grabs you!
Back in the saftey of our learning strip and in amongst the wildlife......a family of ducks & a nest which belonged to a family of fishing & diving Great Crested Grebes. Amazing creatures who often disappear under the water to catch dinner of escape from a fast approaching bright orange kayak! It also started to rain and we were soon wet but didn't feel the cold again until we eventually got out. It had got dark too! Not the best place to be I must admit.....so we got out and sat in 45 minutes of awful traffic in the pouring rain! But I was happy with my new boat and can't wait to get out again.....When the river looks a little more inviting;)

As for today.........I off out on my bike to get a little filthy!



Jason







(C) JPT 2007.........584.03 miles.

I Got a Handle on Things...I Hope!

Hold on or drown...

"A Pinch & a punch....it's the first day of the month"

Mums in agony after a knee replacement operation.....lying in one of the most feared places on earth! A grotty hospital bed....looks clean enough, but look a little closer.....dirt, bacteria, death and disease everywhere! I got the pissing runs for some reason! Where did that come from? I feel great besides this unpredictable shit tap welded to my arse! Ankle feels back to 'Normal'. They are so unpredictable those ankle joints of mine! One day I 'Feel' as though I could run a marathon (I wish) and on others like the other day or two, I feel so useless. I won't give in though! I gotta keep them working and not stay off them just beacause they hurt. If you leave anything still for too long, then it seizes up doesn't it! I definitely think that some sort of action will be required sometime in the future. I think I will know when the time is right.
Got myself a new kayak yesterday afternoon (Dagger RPM). Not a replacement as such....more of a second, more convenient kayak for easier lifting onto the roof of my motorized wheeled Jason mover when I am out on my own. Nice shade of orange (I've been Tangoed). Not blood red as I may have suggested in an earlier post, as I rather like orange. It reminds me of.........oranges? I like oranges and orange juice.....& the little emergency saftey rescue whistles that you should carry around with you when out in the middle of nowhere. I am a little fed up with red & blood if the truth be known;) I haven't tried it out yet as I didn't fancy putting into the Thames at the moment as the water is a little too high, too swollen, too fast and too currenty as a result of all the rain.....not out on my own for the very first time anyway! It is half the size of my other kayak and 5kgs lighter and therefore a lot more wobbly. It'll be as still as a mill pond soon enough, you'll see. I got three in the garage now. The first two I bought for Lee & I exactly ten years ago this month. Two 14ft'ers in bright yellow, just like a giant bleeding banana (mine) and a nice teal colour (Lee's). I am a little nervous to be honest. It is so tiny compared with my other boat. The last thing I want to do is fall in and get that Thames water into my mouth & ears or up my nose! In ten years of kayaking with my other one, I never fell in once (nor Lee).....not by accident anyway. We did some controlled rolls in the ocean a while back, but never in the river. I wouldn't mind practising the eskimo roll sometime soon......preferably in a nice warm & relatively clean swimming pool. We got plans with those things as well as our bikes this year. Can't wait to get in the water again in between my bike rides. Who needs to walk when you can paddle & cycle instead! We're going out late tomorrow afternoon for a little test run in a little quiet part of the river in Sunbury-on-Thames....just up the river from Hampton Court Palace & Shepperton too (Where I got the thing from). Find out in my next post to see if I fell in or not;)

I reckon I may have got these runs from four visits to two different hospitals in the last two days! The best place to go if you're a bacteria addict is your local hospital.....or just lick the inside of your toilet bowl;) But at least my Mothers op went fine and the pain is wearing off as we speak. Lets just hope it works and she does her exercises right. She should be home tomorrow. I should know.....I am picking her up;)

It is so windy out there right now! I was out late yesterday afternoon for a blast around Bushy Park and rather than me doing the blasting.......I was the one that was blasted! I managed 13 miles in the stuff. According to Metcheck it was 20mph, & most of it seemed as though it was blowing right into my face. Technically this cannot be correct as my route is more or less a giant figure of 8, therefore the head wind versus the tail wind versus the side winds should be 25% each? When I got home, I really felt as though I had been cycling up hill the whole time! Interesting as there is not one single hill on the route up or down. It was dry....ish though and only threatened to spit on me. Those white Deer are still sitting around the same exact spot in the park. It must be the same ones as I haven't seen any other white Deer hanging around on nearby street corners. I know they are the same group because one of them has a very distinctively shaped antler, where it has grown down instead of up on one side. He kind of looks like an idiot;) I feel a little sorry for him because he must think one of the other Deer are dangling a branch in front of his eyes to annoy him;) I suppose it is basically their little section of park. The whole park it seems is made up of hundreds of sections divided by paths & trails and the like. Or maybe they are just there because they know I pass by that way regularly;) They moght be thinking the same thing? That idiot bloke on his bikes keeps coming by this way! And I have a funny antler sort of.....my weak right arm;)

Sod it.....wasn't planning on a ride today as I am going out tomorrow night with Lee after my test run in the little segment of orange. I have decided.....as soon as the battery for my light is fully charged, I am outta here!



Jason

P.s. Apparently my kayaks are made from recycled milk cartons. I do like to do my bit;)






(C) JPT 2007.........548.01 miles