35th Injection & Sleeping Trees...

Richmond Park, last Wednesday.

Thursday saw my 35th Interferon injection out of 48. I just cannot believe how 'normal' I feel! Do I feel a bit guilty? Yes I do! I know for a fact that it isn't that easy and some who are on exactly the same tx have some real terrible times! I read about them often on a Hep C Forum I visit. I feel for all of them! On there too are some absolutely wonderful people who care beyond belief that they are alright and do everything they can to help them feel better.....With advice, warm words and comfort....All from personal experiences too. They have all been through it one way or another. I feel very safe knowing that I too have these folk to help me if needed. Thanks guys & gals:)

Pain has come along and shoved his ugly face in my general direction on numerous occasions over the decades, years, weeks & days! Actually, not a single day goes by where there isn't any! But on occasion, it comes along and stays and really sinks his teeth into you....Like a Pit Bull dragging a rotten log, three times it's size & weight, down the path in the local recreation grounds!
Since mid last week, this dog has come and gotten hold of my right ankle....I do my utmost to avoid being dragged by this wheezing, slobbering beast! There is such a thin line I am able to keep from snapping! I can stay indoors and sit and think about the pain, not moving, thinking of ways to have it slain, but this doesn't actually work. I need to use my ankle to keep it from locking up and rusting solid! I have some pretty good pain killers, I only use these last thing at night when I need to sleep....sometimes I still wake with a sharp intake of breath through my clenched teeth. Instantly sitting on the edge of my bed, feet trying to feel the soft carpet. Need to get up and walk around for a while....get that blackened, scorched, thin and watery oil warmed up again. 3am, 4am, 5,6,7am....it doesn't care what the time is!
Still, all that these past few days, has not stopped me going out for my bike rides. It has in the past of course.....always will. But as I said, that thin line can be kept taught, but unbroken. I have managed to keep this up since Wednesday. It will go eventually though. I just don't know when. Like I don't know when it is coming in the first place.
Richmond Park saw me twice last week, once with my best friend Jac. Once on my own. Saw a sleeping tree....home of a thousand bunny rabbits. Thank you Mr Tree for falling asleep and giving us these wonderful tunnels where your roots used to keep you from tripping over. We never had a home like this before!
Last night Lee and I were out for a quick ride around our usual loop of Leith Hill. Pitch black, very wet and muddy! Plenty of permanently surfacing, solidified Eels. Must remember to stay away from this particular hill until next Summer. It is going to be permanently waterlogged until then. Pitch Hill will be a much better bet as it drains very well and most of the tracks are covered in chopped bark, like mulch.
Because of the terrain, I had to chocolate foot (Put my feet down) more than once I can tell you. Plus I was extra cautious where my ankle was concerned. Normally done in one hour, took over two! I remember thinking, when we were right over the furthest point away from the car.....If my bike disappeared in a puff of smoke, I would be totally & utterly useless. Walking is out of the question with this foot! But I can use my bike as a kind of walker (Zimmer Frame).
It didn't disappear, and I cycled back to the car park, shins looking like they had been shat on by a small dog with diarrhea. I did however, find that I had picked up a slime, wet and utterly gross looking slug on my travels! I really don't like slugs! Eversince I put on a shoe one morning, getting ready for school. My shoes were out in the conservatory from the night before. I sipped my socked foot into the shoe and felt something right at the toe end! I took my foot back out and noticed a yellow, orangey stain on my toes! I tipped and shook the shoe until this burst open giant orange slug flopped onto the floor!! I nearly puked! I HATE SLUGS!

Thinking back to last Monday....That may have been the cause of this bout of pain. I went with my neighbour (upstairs) to Bushy Park & Hampton Court Palace for the afternoon. It was a wonderful day, with plenty of sunshine and Rutting Deer....& walking! Quite fascinating it was too. We came across one group of Deer, made up of about 15 females & one giant Stag! Antlers the size of Christmas trees! He seemed to be keeping them in check and waiting for a good time to do his 'businesses'. Three times another Stag approached and retreated from this harem. Not so big and obviously not so bright either as the bigger and better looking Stag. Each time he would walk very slowly up to this group and circle halfway around the back of them only to be chased away by the bigger Stag, calling out to remind him who was boss. You have to give it to the other Stag though. If at first you don't succeed...try, try again.
Hampton Court Palace was great fun too. I have only know my neighbour for about one year. Her & her husband are such wonderful people. They know nothing about me health wise. I wish I could tell them....don't know why. It is such a big part of my life. Worried what they might think of me! I had some not so nice reactions about my HIV when I was a teenager! A girlfriend of mines parents were none too pleased about the 'situation' shall we say. This was back in 87 I might add, When ignorance was very rife and juicy! I'm not so sure that it is any better now really.
I did tell her I had Haemophilia though. I left it at that. Maybe next time we meet.
HCP is such a charming place! I Love the kitchens. I have always said I would Love to travel back in time to visit these kinds of places.....The sights, sounds & smells! Christmas is coming up soon.....A Time Machine please Santa:)

P.s. My numb little finger has over the last few weeks, nearly gone away:)

Jason

"The Edge of My Bed"

All seeing, all knowing....My Eye!

What the hell is that noise! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!........Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!
Jason! Time to get up! Breakfast is ready! Get dressed and get ready for school! I am not going to tell you a bloody gain!
What? School? Not today surely! I haven't been to school since 1986!
I turn over and try and fall back to sleep. Where was I? Ah yes.....levitating....Through will alone...I can take off just by moving my arms gently....like an Angel. Absolutely no effort needed. I Love that I can do this! Building tops & trees are my hiding place. Always at night! The darkness is a wonderful place to be. Everything seems to be covered in a thin film of water. I would slip right off if I were climbing up here! I can see the streets below....not a nice place to fall! They are familiar to me. I don't have to worry about finding dark, narrow, rubbish bin strewn alleys to hide in. I am above all that. What I don't properly understand is; Why do I seem like the only one who can do this? I can see other people below....walking along the deserted streets. I am invisible....not in the real sense...but, just because I am not expected to be up here. No one would beleive it! One look away and I would be gone! I hear voices below; There is nothing there! Don't be so bloody daft!
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!........Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Just what the hell is that noise?
Look....there is a lorry....thats it! A lorry reversing! No! It is not moving! It's lights are out! What is it?
I silently move along in the air....staying close to the roofs and tree canopys. I Love the way the street lights throw thier orange glow over the road below. Large puddles of light. I can see more people. No idea about me! I like it that way. I am silent. I hear everything there is to be heard! I see it all! I Love this freedom. Only at night! The days are for the living.....the nights are for me! I was born at 01:13.....Perfect!
Moving along further still.....faster.....down slightly to a dark corner of Brinsworth House. I use the cover of a big, old tree to hide from anyone looking. In the big front garden I peer over the wall. I notice a bench "In Memory of.......". On it is sat two young people. Apparently trying to find something more than just nothing! They have no idea I am watching. Not interested I leap back into the air. As high as the tallest house down here. A few lights are still on. People getting ready for bed after a boring night out. What can be better than this. I can go anywhere! I don't need drink nor food! I don't even breathe.
Am I the only one? Where are all the others? The sky should be full of them. I am quite happy to be the only one here! This is the way it should be. Me, alone and in darkness! All seeing & hearing. This IS me!
Another person down on the street below....just a dark figure....in between puddles of light....standing still! Stopped to light a cigerette perhaps? Their arms are by their sides! Waiting for a friend even? I move along behind the roofs and chimneys of the houses.....not taking my eyes off this strange dark figure. There is no one behind him. My god! Is he looking at me? Surely he can't have seen me! I keep moving....through the wet branches of a tree....his face is definitely following my movement. I stop for a moment...ducking behind a slimey wet rooftop, leading down into an overgrown garden. I take a peep over the very tip of the roof.....towards where the figure is. Slowly he comes into view. He is facing me straight on now.....head looking up right in my direction! Face is as black as midnight! Eyes small and wanting! Mouth shut, hungry! He is almost on me before I realize that he has taken off and is coming right at me! This cannot be happening! No! I must get away.....I can't move...I am frozen in place! There he is.....reaching to grab me....Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!.............Bloody hell!
I am sitting on the edge of my bed. Eyes still half closed. It is light outside. Glass of water in my hand. Phone! SHUT UP! I switch off the alarm on my mobile...re-set it for 20:27. I take the top off of my meds holder and fill my dry mouth full of pills! I have amazed many with my pill swallowing abilities. All in one go, they go down.....into my stomach. Water pours over my face and chin. I sometimes miss my mouth entirely with the glass! It drips into my naked lap. I wait a minute....air displaced by the pills, bubbles up to the top of my throat. My duvet drags me back into bed and once again I am sleeping. Looking for the night again!

Jason

One Year On from Ben

Diana Fountain, Bushy Park, Today.

What a wonderful sunset this afternoon! I had been for a little bike ride (3 hrs) around the Surrey Hills with my friend Lee. A pretty cool day with no crashes either. Plenty of other like minded mountain bikers had already flooded the little shop in Peaslake Village & had already scoffed all the sandwiches! Lee had to make do with a sausage roll and I had bought my home made sarnie & date & marmalade cake...MMMmmm! Pitch Hill & Holmbury Hill felt the big knobbly tread from our tyres and was kind to us in return for not skidding too much on their root sodden backs. A medium drive home, traffic had been diverted on our trip home and also a fatal motorcycle crash didn't help. Box Hill (Rykas) on a Sunday brings out, amongst the more sensible riders, some very fast & irresponsible maniacs.
Drove through Bushy Park and saw the sun setting behind Diana, dropped Lee off back in Strawberry Hill. I just could not resist going back into the park for this wonderful snap, Swan et al.
A great day and talk of a trip to Lulworth Cove with our kayaks sometime in the next week or two:) All is looking good:)
Also today see's the one year anniversary of when Lee & I and my younger Sisters partner Nathan hiked up Ben Nevis. It was a wonderful experience and something we want to do again. When I have finished tx I will plan another trip up to Scotland to do just that! In the photograph I took of the summit (see below) you can see Lee & Nathan approaching the summit. It looks very eerie with them being the only ones in the photo. There were a few others up there too, but had the good manners to duck whilst I took it;) The drop on the left is not for the faint hearted! I had to have an injection of Factor VIII for my Haemophilia on the summit in the frozen ruins of the old observatory, and the thin tube that comes from the syringe to the butterfly went solid as it was so cold! My feet were killing me and I still had a four hour hike to get through before I reached the bottom, and a 9 hour drive the next morning too. I have done it three times now.....Piece of cake;)
We were the last off the Ben that night and for 2 hours were hiking in pitch black darkness! We were very well prepared for all emergency though and had very full Camelbaks & some pretty cool torches. Plus my codeine phosphate came in handy I can tell you! The next morning we were all totally and utterly F****d! Mind over matter and painkillers saw us back to London safely:) I won't tell you about the burger and fries we had in the Glen Nevis Restaurant when we reached the bottom.....Yes I will... The best ever burger in the whole wide world that I have ever had!!! Brilliant weekend!

Ben Nevis, 15th October 2005.

Jason

34th needle and Crying Mums...

Eel Pie Island, River Thames, Twickenham, Thursday.

Since my encounter with the wonderful Deer in Bushy Park on Monday I have learned what they were actually doing with all that painful bellowing across the dying yellow grass of the park. I have "Autumn Watch" on BBC2 to thank for that. It has finished now which is a shame...very good show & all live too. Bill Oddie is funny, everytime he saw himself on the monitor he seemed to be tidying his hair. Seem to forget sometimes he was in "The Goodies".
Right....Since Monday then I have been doing the kind of stuff I like to do and in the kind of weather I like to do it in. Another ride around Richmond Park on Tuesday....Very high tide along the footpath! The whole length was a foot under water. I did the whole length trying not to get wet feet! Silly really, fighting a bit of a loosing battle I was. It's not so nice either when you can't see where the bank ends and the river starts. Good fun though. Played havoc with my ankle joints though! They don't like to get cold & wet! I could hardly walk when I got home!
Then Wednesday more cycling...This time in the other direction towards Bushy Park. Lovely and sunny, wind nice and little. A few midges (bloody Muffleheads!) still alive and looking for the odd orifice of the Human type (Nowhere near as bad as in the Summer & the vicious Highland Midge I encountered in Fort William in June! Millions is an understatement!). Dogs out in force looking for a free Squirrel shaped meal:) It doesn't surprise me that one was wearing a muzzle. The trip back home took me right past Hampton Court Palace....Very quiet looking and probably pretty glad to be rid of all those camera wielding tourists looking for the ghost of Thomas Cardinal Wolsey (did you know that Henry VIII built 49 other places around England similar in style to HCP & none remain today!).
Along the towpath back to Kingston I noticed some of the leaves (don't know what kind of plant) from the Palace spilling over the wall onto the river side. turning a bright red! Autumn is here and the years carry on regardless.

Autumns death, gives life...

As I took the photo, another cyclist was riding up and down wondering what the hell I was doing bending down, looking right into the leaves! Three times she went past. I was tempted to say that I had found a secret portal into another world, what only my little camera could see....thought better of it in the end! I don't look too good in straight-jackets!....not white ones anyway;)

So on to Thursday, A very short, impulsive decision to go for a little kayak up the Thames (see photo at top). Only the day before I had seen some kayakists paddling away and thought that that is what I am going to do tomorrow. Ideally I would have Loved to take a drive to Lulworth Cove, My favorite Kayaking area. My friend Lee and I have planned to go together in the next month. I am all excited just thinking about it, it has been a while........Christ on a bike!! It has been 2 years since I was last down at the "Door" (Durdle Door)! This can't be right...but it is and the Cove here we come...watch this space!
So...I launch right under St Marys Church in Twickenham. Signs everywhere warning drivers of the massive risk of flooding at high tide. Believe me, I have seen plenty of half submerged cars, a tasty treat for the very greedy and not very choosy Thames! But before I take to the Thames, I have lunch over at my younger Sister Tania's. My little niece Millie was there too:) And my Mum. I went onto Tania's PC to see what my blog looked like (I have a Mac). I read one of my previous posts titled "For the Love of Livers" out to them, they were interested as to what sort of stuff I do on there. My Mum don't do computers and wouldn't read it herself. Anyway, by the time I was finished, My Sister said; "See what you've done? I looked up and saw my Mum was crying! I had no idea it would have that effect on her! I never no what to do when I see people crying. I'm not used to crying at all. It doesn't come easily to me for some reason....
.....The sun was very low in the late afternoon sky! It was almost like looking into the proverbial tunnel of light to another world...I needed sun glasses! I was forced to paddle in the direction of the sun (Teddington Lock) as I needed to stay against the flow of the tide, because coming back to the car would be much easier if my arm began to hurt. So off I go, cutting through the oncoming water, being careful to avoid being a local fisherman's biggest catch of the day! Past Trevor Bayliss' house on Eel Pie Island, round the long sweeping left hand bend towards the Lock at Teddington. A lone Swan thunders past from behind me, almost level with my head! These kind of sights don't come too often but when they do....well, it was like when Concorde used to fly over my Mums garden every day, I always stopped and just stared in amazement! Swans make a terrific sound as they swoosh past, wheezing & squeaking as they plunge those ginormous wings up and down!
Up to the Lock itself, passing Rick Parfitts' (Status Quo) riverside apartment. The weir part of the lock was letting in tonnes of water from the non-tidal part of the Thames and made the whole area a no-no for paddling, especially since I was all alone and not wearing a buoyancy aid! I know, I know...! I do have one, but this part of the Thames is so predictable I don't bother. (Slapped wrist starting to sting). I turn around and head back for Twick just as it gets dark. The tide had risen now and has flooded part of the road. Again, very predictable if you know the area. My car was safe and sound:) My day ended in more water in the form of a Lovely warm bath when I got in doors:) A nice little taster for the impending trip to The Cove (with buoyancy aid). Thursday night also saw my 34th Interferon injection go into battle, all guns blazing and wearing steel toe capped boots for the ones who are still squirming in the darkest recesses of my liver.....Stamp those little parasites into dust....Lovely!
So on to Friday! Friday 13th! A trip up to the RFH in Hampstead for my 4 weekly Hep C tx bloods. Lovely sunny day again. Stinky dirty train, look for a discarded "Metro" newspaper to read on the half hour trip. Collect copies of my blood results (from the beginning of tx to present day) I requested a few days before. I wanted to see what my levels have been up to over the last 8 months. I may have to post them on to the forum and Maybe Ross can decipher them for me.
Quickly in and quickly out, back home and prepare myself for a night ride around Pitch Hill, Surrey with my friend Lee. As it's name suggests, it is pitch black when we arrive at the car park in Peaslake. Great weather for cycling, dry'ish, little wind and not too cold. I could tell the Winter is only around the corner though. We had a nice 2 hour ride under the stars and trees. But right near the end, we took a look down a steep looking channel we have named "The Trench", Lee went first and halfway down lost control and went right over his handlebars! He was very lucky! A bit shaken....more worried about his bike and new lights! Oh well, Friday 13th couldn't take a night off could it!

Lee & I. Friday 13th. (post crash)

That was it really. Bit of a long post this time, & 3 photos too:) By the way, Lee is 6ft 4! He looks shorter than me in this photo. I am 5ft 11 on a good day;)

P.s. Friday the 13th, October, 2006....13+10+2006=13!

Jason

The Hep C Cat & the Liver...

Back Door to a Ghost Train. Hastings, 2004

***WARNING: THIS DREAM MAY UPSET ANIMAL LOVERS***

I dream! Therefore I am!

I was compelled to write down my dream this morning. I dream often, but usually I am quite happy to let it go by the wayside and forget all about it (usually within 5 minutes). But this morning was not so! I just could not sleep until I had got it written down on paper.

Hep C cats.....Why is that strange man crying? He seems to be looking for someone...or something along a quiet leafy street. He is looking down at ground level, towards the pavement. It is dry, warm & bright. The air is still. He's holding a grotty old, grime covered towel, hidden slightly behind his back...seemingly ready to smother something with it! I follow his gaze and, find a little, pathetic looking cat sitting on the hard concrete slabs that make up the pavement. The man stops in his tracks, keeping his distance and freezes on the spot...hands tighten around the towel...knuckles white with strength and face white with fear! This poor cat is weak...very weak & tired! Dark, yellow eyes, harldly able to keep them open. Is that cat alright? I ask....No reply! The cat is so weak and feeble, it seems to be melting into the pavement. From somewhere it finds the strength to look up....right up towards the sky. It is wearing this look of complete fear across it's pained face...with a hint of relief too. Beginning to shake and panic the cat looks at the strange man and his towel....still fixed to the spot and with no courage! A pathetic coward! The cat then looks right at me....right into my eyes. Those eyes are saying that I must "do it!". I look around to find something to help me. The towel seems a bit silly for what I want to do. I need to do this properly and quickly....with absoultely no doubt. I notice a moss covered statue of a cat sitting in the garden next to me....too small! An old house brick atracts my attention, sharp edges but not very heavy! But then I spot it....A sign post half propped up outside a condemned derelict house...the sign has a large clump of rock hard concrete stuck to the bottom. This will have to do. It is heavy and cumbersome...I drag it over towards the cat. It is still waiting where I left it. With every step I make back towards this cat, it looks more and more at peace. I notice a small group of people have gathered near the cat. One of them is a firefighter, his helmet and boots dirty and scuffed. I plonk the post down on the pavement with a thud. The group look up at me, then at the post. It seems I am too late! The firefighter has dropped a paving slab right over this cat with a mighty thump! There are no gaps to be seen between pavement and deathly slab. The slab is lifted up and a peek is taken underneath...to see...hoping all is well. The cat is dead and at great peace now. Left only is a dark greasy putrid stain. There are tears and smiles all around....knowone talks...it is all over and done with...life can continue now...forgive & forget!

I think this dream was forum induced from last night. I was replying to two or three members who had just taken their first Interferon injection to rid themselves of Hep C. And I was thinking where they will be going in the next 48 weeks and also the period after treatment comes to an end. That all important part where we hope that it will never come back! The cat in the dream I took to be the spirit of a Hep C riddled liver, half dead from months of poison! Loosing the battle, lost in transition and looking for a quick end. Any help will do....just "do it"! The man with the towel might have been my frightened, coward side and the firefighter was the side of me who knows exactly what to do...no thinking needed! But the part I played in the dream may have been the side of me who just tries his best, but always too late....hoping someone else will do it for me.

Jason

I'm so tired!

Very tired Deer. Bushy Park, Today

I don't mean me by the way. I'm not tired at all. I just had a Lovely cup of de-ca-co (de-caf coffee) & 6 biscuits (3 ginger nuts & 3 dark chocolate digestives). I can hear the tumble dryer going round & round in the kitchen and the TV insists on showing me tits, real murder & repeat showings of old cop shows! Take your pick!
Anyways, I have been out and about this very Lovely day. It is my best (female) friends 33rd Birthday today and I have been taking photographs of boring things like Twickenham Riverside, York House Gardens Statues & the Deer in Bushy Park too. Jac went to Brighton to look around the shops there. The last time I went to Brighton I was kayaking under the piers. The very old and terribly neglected closed down Victorian West Pier was such a fascination to see up close, to be in amongst all that decay & history. I could almost see up the skirts & bustle of the young Victorian ladies as I looked up through the rotting slats from underneath the pier. Oh for a Time Machine!

It was so warm today! It reached about 22*c. So out I went with my trusty camera. It is a Canon IXUS500 digital compact (very basic) but it's amazing what kind of photos you can get with it. I really must get a proper digital SLR of some sort. I have been meaning to for some time. So there I was, out in the Lovely weather enjoying my cheese & ham with roasted vegetables panini purchased from Starbucks in York St, Twickenham. Took a walk down to the Thames, past the site of the old swimming pool...so sad! Past a line of fine looking pigeons sitting on the railings (poor railings). Got a whiff of beer & lager as I found my way past The Barmy Arms Pub and sat on the concrete slab on the rivers bank, overlooking the view up towards Richmond Hill and The Royal Star & Garter Home for old disabled war veterans (our heros).
Finished up my lunch and walked to the statues that I Love very much. I remember as a very young teenager, 'The Cure' made a video for "Hanging Garden" from the brilliant "Pornography" album there and just weeks later the statues were covered in all kinds of obscene goth related graffiti & empty bottles of Tipex thinner strewn about the place. I remember quite well (who could forget) that one of the girls, whom were all totally naked, had a bright pink bush of hair spray painted onto her private parts! I never touched them, you must believe me. All I could do was stare and wonder wether my (first) future girlfriend would have one like it;) (My lips are sealed).
The statues are looking wonderful now of course. They have for some time. Ever since they got a makeover in the way of a Lovely sand blasting from the local council and a "hidden" camera was installed. It has been a long time since Robert Smith freaked out the whole of Twickenham with his big hair & dodgy lipstick. I am a fan of course:)
The day was moving along at a very rapid speed, and before I knew it, it was almost 4pm. I jumped into the car and made my way to Bushy Park just up the road near to where I live. The sun was still shining and the warmth no less. As soon as I got out of the car all I could hear were the Stag Deer calling for mates. You can hear them from some distance away. It is such an eerie sound. Almost like some kind of pre-historic beast might sound like. I saw one resting in the long yellow grass, his antlers sticking up all nice and pointed (an Imperial if I'm not mistaken due to the point count). He looked ever so tired, grass draping from his antlers, momentarily stooping until his chin reached the ground, then back up and head high, calling....tired and still ready for more. I suppose he is calling for female Deer to mate with? Or other Stags to fight with? I took my photo and let him be. Took a walk through the dry, yellow grass, the same grass that Henry VIII rode over whilst hunting these Deer. Meandered through a clump of very foul smelling giant mushrooms before driving back to the real world. I am one lucky MF to have this place right on my doorstep!

Jason

Mud & mushrooms, dinner & feeling weird!

Me, My Bike & My Rucksack today

Feeling a tad weird right now! Been out for dinner with my best friend Jac and her p & m. It's her 33d Birthday tomorrow (same as John Lennons). She has these new veneers on her front teeth. Cost a fortune, but she looks absoultely wonderful! She can't stop looking at them! Anyways...the reason I am feeling weird is because Her p & m took me & Jac out to a nice restaurant and I took my meds just as I was eating. This always makes it feel worse than normal, when I eat food out. Plus the being out and in different surroundings from normal too may have a contributing factor. I wish I could explain it! I am fine, I have gotten used to it by now. My HIV meds are to blame. They do their job, which is the main thing.
Before I had a really great evening I went out to Leith Hill with my bike. The weather was perfect too! Dry, slight breeze, sunny spells and not too warm. I got down to the Landslip car park for about 11:30am and did my usual 13 mile loop of all the best tracks including Summer Lightning. I won't bore you with all the misplaced mud, dying ferns and fake waterfalls etc, but I had a great day and when I got home this afternoon, I doctored a photograph I took of myself wearing a favorite t-shirt of mine on Photoshop. In it I am looking out over the South Downs towards Brighton and the south coast. It is a great veiw and at times you can see the sea on a very clear day. Bit hazy today though (like me). The highlight of the ride though has to be watching a bunch of macho Aussie mountain bikers contemplating wether or not to ride down "Deliverance!" I had already done it once and was keen to see some one else try it. There was some talk of saddles being lowered but nothing else. Once again....Deliverance was left in peace! I left with a smile on my face:) And also todays ride saw an abundance of "Amanita muscaria" mushrooms (the red ones with the white spots). I will probably post a photo of one on here sometime soon. For some starnge reason I really like to look at mushrooms in the wild. Oh, I washed my bike yesterday and it looked like new again. It was so filthy! Well, it needs another bath!
Bills to pay tomorrow, shopping to get in too.

Jason

33rd Injection & Spotted Dick (without custard)

Richmond Hill, Tonight

Back in the saddle again. It felt so good tonight with the wind & rain & puddles...Oh the puddles! They never stopped laying themselves down for me. I must admit, I did dodge a few at first, but then just gave into their being. I was fighting a loosing battle with those damn things! I looked exactly like a spotted dick without the custard when I eventually got home. But Richmond Park and the River Thames towpath are ok really. I like the way the cars wait for the Deer to cross the road. They (the cars) keep right back, WAY back. Just in case the Deer were to explode or something. And must only continue driving when said Deer has entered The Twilight Zone;) Maybe they are waiting to see some Deer sex? I have seen it! The foreplay thing with their antlers is an amazing sight & sound! The park will be closing soon for culling! Too much sex!
It was nice though being out and knowing I am well again and watertight etc. It was only a local ride. Couldn't be bothered with the horrendous Friday night traffic to Peaslake. Tomorrow maybe a better day for driving & for weather.
I was sure I could see Mick Jagger spying on me from his bedroom window in the flat behind me when I took todays photo. But alas, he is in Canada tonight with the rest of his band.
This photo looks out over Twickenham and Teddington. The bright light on the horizon to the right is Twickenham Rugby Ground.
My trainers took a shower with me tonight. They needed it more than I did! I had taken them off. I just gave them a rinse before popping them into the washing machine along with my 'spotted dick' clothes;) I cooked myself a very nice dinner, which went down very nicely! After last week, my appetite seems to have come back ten fold! I was watching "Twin Peaks" (again) last night and the scene where Jerry brings Ben and his whole family (during dinner) a giant brie baggette each from his travels. It is the way Ben unrolls them from the paper they are wrapped in, then smells them right up and down before sticking as much as is humanly possible into his mouth! MMMmmmm! I wanted one so much! Non Twin Peaks fans look bemused at this stage;)
Anyway, now I have a kitchen full of dirty pots and stuff! It will wait until tomorrow.
At least my ipod is all nice and charged for tomorrows drive to The Woods:)

P.s. My 33rd Interferon injection went very well last night. I haven't noticed chills as I sometimes do. Not many to go now! I think my 48th injection will be on the 18th January 06, 5 days befroe my 36th Birthday.

Jason

No Easy Ride!

Stencil. Brixton, London

Yes, I was having an easy ride! Or so I thought anyway. But it seems that my recent bout of diarrhea maybe a wake up call. Just reminding me what sort of regime I am on! It still hasn't been connected to my treatment on Hep C, or HIV. But it did come from somewhere.
I took up my poop sample yesterday & my bloods from Monday were all fine! No call today, so all must be ok! Just a stomach bug from some dodgy food perhaps? Over doing it on my bike? I don't know. It has been exactly one week now since it began & it still hasn't gone away properly yet!
It has been a horrible week & one I don't want to repeat anytime soon! I really hope that it is going now. I won't speak too soon, so I won't.
I have been well and truly reminded though! I was petrified that I would end up in hospital! More than once I thought that I could very easily pack it all in and just lie there and starve to death. Then I wouldn't have to go back to the loo again & again & again! Food was going in I might add, but not down. It seemed to hang around in my throat somewhere. Just sitting. I felt sick the whole time. I was never sick once though. It somehow managed to make it's way down and out, as it did on numerous occasions. But eating was forced. As was drinking. I just wanted to stop and leave it and not bother...
But I did, as I had to. And now it seems...
Well, I am not talking!